All The Things About Drinking Alcohol That Movies Are Wrong About

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Movies love a good drinking scene, and both Cinema and TV are chock full of scenes of drinking, drinkers and drunk alcoholics. And while there’s no harm in most of it, some of the drinking scenes in movies are passing out bad advice left and right.

We intend to stop that now. Grab a drink and settle in as we separate fact from fiction.

Drinking An Old-fashioned Drink Means You’re Cool
While there’s nothing wrong with knowing your classics or having an alcohol you love, it’s pretty respectable. However, it isn’t a “one weird tip” trick to becoming a Don. It simply means you have a favourite.

Shake Your Alcohol, Don’t Stir It
Quite common in movies and probably pioneered by James Bond who is the progenitor of one of the most widely traveled mixological untruths: that a Martini ought to be shaken, not stirred.

For the record, it shouldn’t. A simple rule to follow is if it’s all spirits, it’s all stirred. A shaken Martini is over-diluted, cloudier and just plain wrong.

You Can Win A Drink Contest
In real life, even if you win a drinking contest, you still lose. Movies have always portrayed characters going head to head in drinking contests, usually as a quick way to show how much pf a badass they really are.

This myth has found its way from old westerns to summer blockbusters, as well: Legolas turning the tables on Gimli in Lord of the Rings and Thor downing Boilermakers.

If you’ve ever seen or participated in a drinking contest, you know reality looks quite different. Come to think of it, the end of a marathon drinking contest doesn’t look all that different than the end of an actual marathon.

Being An Alcoholic Is Charming And Easy
From Arrested Development’s Lucille Bluth to Walter Matthau in Bad News Bears and Tyrion Lannister in Game of Thrones, the camera has a way of making even the most desperate alcohol drinkers into something charming or at least comic.

Hell, even when they aren’t charming, they more often than not are able to pull it together at the last minute. In real life, alcoholics are usually different from what is portrayed and aren’t as charming as they seem.

Bar Fights Are Fun And Important People Don’t Get Hurt
How could a dark, cramped space full of drunks throwing wild punches, chairs and bottles end badly? The list of movies that feature bar fights is huge and somewhat endless probably because they are really fun to watch. They also come in a variety of flavours, too.

You may have seen the quick and deadly bar fight or the knock down, drag out, where two men slug it out. The best of them all, though, is the total anarchy of the take-no-prisoners “whole room” brawl which pops up in projects as diverse as The Pirates of the Caribbean, Terminator 2, and the animated children’s film The Great Mouse Detective.

In real life, bar fights are messy and unpredictable. And they make it hard to enjoy your alcohol, man.

Sheriff

Sheriff

Normal everyday dude uniquely different in an everyday manner, a young man that strongly believes in the Nigerian project. I'm a mixture of science, arts and politics. I can be engaged on twitter @SheriffSimply

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