Check out this scenario. You have a friend. He one day meets and falls in love with a girl and you’re happy for him. You get to meet the girl and you totally know she’s cool. But there’s a problem. As the days pass by, you’re falling in love with her.
Have you found yourself in a scenario like this? You probably have, as a lot of guys have. Here are things you should consider before allowing your thoughts and feelings spiral out of control.
How Sure Are You Of What You Feel?
Falling for a friend’s girlfriend is treading dangerous grounds and you have to be very careful of the things you do. You’re basically left with two options. Keep admiring the girl from far till you forget about her or steal her away from your friend.
How Close Are You To Your Friend?
If you ever get to seek for people’s opinion, they probably will tell you to shelve the idea on first thought. The thing here however is that every single circumstance is different. And it could be that getting to date your friend’s girlfriend could be the best thing that could ever happen to you and everyone else.
You have to tell yourself the truth about how well you know your friend. If your friend can pass for your bestie, it’s best you stop. It’s all shades wrong to try to steal your bestie’s girlfriend no matter what’s going on between you guys. The only time it’s allowed is if he consents to it and you date her after they’ve broken up which in most cases doesn’t end well. If you however don’t know your friend that much, then you’re allowed to entertain the thought.
The Bro Code
The bro code is a set of unwritten rules for guys by guys. Trying to steal your friend’s girlfriend behind his back is one of the rules you’d be breaking. This could have a resultant effect of all your friends shunning you for your actions.
How Happy Is She With Your Friend?
You may think she’s unhappy in her relationship with your friend but know that what you think doesn’t really matter. It’s all about the facts. Is she really unhappy in her relationship? Did she tell you so? If the answers to these questions are ‘yes’, then she probably feels something for you or why else would a girl tell her boyfriend’s friend that she’s unhappy? You should however avoid creating complications by flirting with her if you have no intentions of having a relationship with her.
How Sure Are You That She Likes You?
A lot of men are confused in determining whether she likes them or not. Simply because she talks nicely or flirts with you doesn’t mean she likes you enough to want to date you. It could be she just wants to be friendly. If she doesn’t make an attempt to kiss you, hold your hands when both of you have privacy or tells you out rightly she likes you, never let your thoughts wander. Be 99% sure of what she feels before you fall for her.
Do You Enjoy Your Time With Her?
Is your friend’s girlfriend spending a lot of time with you, or going out of her way to talk to you? Do both of you have wonderful conversations laced with romance and seduction now and then? It may all feel really happy and sappy, but you have to remember that both of you are intentionally walking into something that could only create more problems. Do you really have to sweet talk her and try to make her feel like you’re a better guy? Are you really being a good friend here?
Dating Your Friend’s Girlfriend
The moment you’re sure that you care more about having your friend’s girlfriend than you do about your friend and you’re certain that she likes you too, you can start making your moves. It’s better you steal the girlfriend of a friend that you know is not treating her well or if he’s not a good friend to you. During the process of wooing her, try and tell your other friends about how badly your friend is treating his girlfriend and how she constantly complains about his attitude towards her. By letting your other friends know what’s going on, you can end up looking like the hero. Remember not to propose to date her while she’s still in the relationship with your friend. If she likes you, she will end the relationship with your friend first. The moment you’re past this, you can introduce her to your other friends. Ensure you make your friends know that you have good intentions and you only want to make her feel better after a bad relationship.
Lastly, if you’re sure you like your friend’s girlfriend enough to want to lose a friend, go ahead. If you however value your friendship more than the girl who’s not sure of what or who she wants, then do all you can to avoid her.