Woman Who ‘Fell In Love With A Tree’ Explains How They Have Sex

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After having her heart broken repeatedly, Emma McCabe has finally found love in a tree called Tim. She wants to get married to Tim and she described the sex as amazing. Here is a quote from Emma;

“He fulfils my emotional and sexual needs. I orgasm by rubbing against the bark naked. I love the feeling of skin-on-bark contact, which gives me a more pleasurable pain sensation, and the feel of his leaves against my skin makes me tingle. I have sex with him every week — it’s the best I’ve ever had!”

King

King

King is a writer and guitarist. He is an opinionated, multi talented individual with love for music and everything it concerns

20 comments

  1. Someone oughta tell her that poplar’s don’t live very long. James: Tell a female ginkgo she’s genderless. Or a male mulberry. I could go on . . . Now I have to go soothe Teresa, my beautiful sassafras.

  2. Is there any way in hell I can contact this woman and tell her that I’ve been looking for that deadbeat, Tim? We have three saplings together and that piece of shit hasn’t paid child support in eight months.

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