It is every lady’s dream that wants to get married to settle down with a man that adores, cherishes her, respects her and her wishes, makes her feel like the luckiest woman in the world; in short, to meet the man that will make every woman green with envy, a man of her dreams but as women want the fairy-tale kind of relationship, some settle for lesser than they deserve and they end up tying the knot with their worst nightmare. The experience of other married relatives, friends, siblings and neighbors have scarred some people and has made them give up totally on finding any guy who will really make them happy. The belief of many is that good men are extinct and only Luciferish kind of men exist in this present time which is totally wrong. There are good men out there who would love you unconditionally and give you the best you deserve but these are some of the reasons you have not or will not get him:
#YOUR BELIEF ABOUT MEN IN GENERAL: as pointed out earlier, many believe that good men existed only in the days of their forefathers. They see every man that meets them as devil’s siblings. No matter how good a man is to them, they always have the notion “all men are dogs” in their mind. It should then not be surprising, when these set of women attract nothing but pigs and dogs to themselves.
#YOUR LACK OF UNDERSTANDING OF WHAT RELATIONSHIP IS ALL ABOUT: just as the belief of good men gone and buried, many have different beliefs about what relationship is all about. Most ladies today do not know what being in a relationship entails and then get it all wrong. If you believe that dating a boy is to make money, please the people around you or just to fulfill what you think is a societal obligation, then you may never meet a man of your dreams; any man would do just fine as long as he suits the purpose you need him for.
#YOUR LACK OF COMMITMENT: many women want the best but how many are willing to commit themselves to a relationship? No relationship can work with a resistance from you to fully commit yourself to a relationship, so you have to work to make it happen. Sacrifices are inevitable in relationships. There is nobody calling the shots or making the rules, the both of you have to work together to make it the relationship of your dreams. A woman who keeps saying “this is the way I am and will always be” will only end up chasing the good men away from herself.
#YOUR LACK OF CHARACTER: many want the Cinderella kind of love but have zero character to make it work. Keeping a good man is not about spending hours at the salon or in front of a mirror; although taking good care of yourself matters a lot too in keeping a man but you need to have a very good character to make him stay. Your personality is a key determinant if you will land a man that will make you happy for the rest of your life. Don’t just be beautiful outside, be enchanting inside too.
#YOUR STANDARDS ARE TOO LOW OR TOO HIGH: do you want a man that drives a 10million Naira car with a house in 1004 estate with great body, handsome face irrespective of what he does for living or how he treats you? Or do you settle for everybody that comes your way including the tout shouting “wole pelu change e” at the bus stop? Or once a man shows the slightest inkling that he likes you, you are quick to bombard him with your needs or throw your legs open? Your standards are a reflector of your inner person; most times. Learn to build your dating checklist around things that are realistic and will sustain your relationship when things are rough and love seems to have flown out of the window.
Finding the man of your dreams requires always adding positive more to yourself. It is not just about the fact that you are fine, sexy, religious, learned, intelligent, rich, from a good home, a respectable background but about understanding the true meaning of what companionship and commitment is all about; one cannot work without the other. Great relationships are built on foundation that can uphold the couple when things are shaky and feels like it is crumbling. When you understand that, you will land the man of your dreams in no time.