Judge Me Not (Random Rant)

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I have a bad girl look or so I’ve been told and many times too. Whatever that means, I wouldn’t know. Sometimes, I go as far as asking some of the people that don’t really know me well, like some of my neighbors and coursemates and they are always like “Alice, bad girl ni e joor. You look like that party freak, jasi kinda babe” and in my mind I go “mo daran o”. Most times, I try to argue with them but after a while I would notice it was a futile mission; they had formed an opinion about me without knowing me just by the way I look, the way I sometimes act like I don’t give a hoot about anything, the way I dress because I love to wear shorts and some skirts/dresses that show off my legs. P.S: I don’t have long legs like a model’s. I’m a chubby girl and that wouldn’t just suit my body frame but I have legs that are smooth, fresh and spotless. I know you’re doing the yimu thing but hey I’ve been told by many people so many times, so I love to flaunt my legs whenever I feel like it. Some even tell me they know I’m a bad chick from some of my pictures. Those pictures are pictures revealing a little flesh (did I hear you say you want to see? It is rated +30 *lolling my head away*) and I wonder if a girl can’t have pictures on her phone that makes her feel good about her body once in a while especially days that are not so great.


My body is not the point, the point is why do people tend to judge you from afar? They take one look at you and they’ve concluded deep within them that this is what you are or who you are. I mean, is my picture supposed to be a determinant of how bad I am or the way I dress or by the way I joke with people? Why can’t people just take their time to meet you, get to know you before deciding what adjective to qualify you with? Some boys especially, assume you to be a loose chick because you’re showing a little skin.. I once had this guy on bbm that assumed me to be a very angry babe because of my personal messages and I couldn’t help but be astonished at how people can judge you when then they know so little about you.


Do not judge me, I might not be who you think I am. I’m a girl with so much love in my heart and I care a great deal about everything around me. I’m not some monster that actually gives attitude at every slight chance. I laugh a lot and I’m very jovial. I play with everyone around me regardless of your age or class. Why am I taking my time to stress this? (I know some of you don ask “how e take concern us”) I’m taking my time to write this because I’m tired of people’s condemnation about one particular thing or another. I’m tired of people pointing accusing fingers when they don’t even know jack about you. I’m tired of people jumping into conclusions about the kind of life I live because of something as trivial as my personal message or facebook status or tweet. I’m tired of people judging me. You see me in public keeping a straight face and you already deduce that I’ll be a proud chick. Have you ever thought if I had so much going on with me and I keep that straight face because it’s better than the tears I’d have been shedding? You see my tattoo and you’re already screaming “that babe na correct bad girl” (and yes, I truly have tattoos. Two). Maybe you should call and ask me the true story behind the inked signs on my body or you think everyone with tattoo loves the pain that comes with and after drawing it? I know you’re already thinking “this babe should swerve joor, you only want to make excuses” and I’m thinking there goes the judgment again. Or because I have more male friends than the other sex and you already assume I must be a freak of some sort. Can’t I have male friends without any bad inkling? They see you talk with your friend in his car through the window and already think you’re making some non-righteous deal; the “olosho” kind. Can’t I talk to whoever I want and however I want because of some people that are so judgmental? I love to party, drink till I’m a bit drunk and dance till my feet aches. Is there anything wrong with that? I go to church for both mid-week programs and sunday programs and you sneer and say “omo esu to n lo church”. How did you know I’m with the devil? The devil discussed that with you or what? I just don’t understand how you know some things about me that I don’t even know about myself.


Don’t judge me, it only diminishes my appeal in your eyes. Maybe my message is irrelevant to you or maybe you think I’m the one who needs to check myself, yes I agree to that albeit a little. Check yourself too. Why do you take one look at my dp and form those opinions about me? Why do you judge with that one thing you have heard about me? Why do you choose to dwell on my past and make it a sort of reference page for my present? Why are you so quick to calling me a bad girl? Is it because you prefer to live on an illusion of what I am than to truly take your time to study me? Maybe you’re right or maybe you’re not… He without sin should cast the first stone!!!


P.S: this is for every girl like me… Judged from afar because of some certain irrelevant factors… It doesn’t matter what they say, we are who we are not what they say we are!!


Alice Temitope Dako

Alice Temitope Dako

A passionate reader, a photographer of thoughts and an ardent book collector. A nerd in love with the world built by words... www.theinkheartnlog.com


  1. When you look down a dark alley and decide “Maybe I don’t wanna go down there.” Is it because you got to know that alley? Did you know that at one time that alley was a really happening place to be? That some really cool people hung out there? No. You see the dirt on the ground, or the lack of light, and your imagination runs wild. It could be there is a serial killer running loose in that alley. There could be homeless people who want to beg you for money down there, and even though the thing you want may be just on the other side of that alley. You don’t go down it because you judge it by it’s appearance. Don’t judge that alley! lol

    It would be nice if people could look at each other without judging them. But the fact that the loose women do, on average, flaunt it more than the ones who hold out, means if you wear the costume you get the badge. The old saying goes, if it looks like a duck, walks like a duck and talks like a duck, it’s a duck. Well if something has feathers and a bill, with webbed feet, and it waddles. I’m not going to say, “Hey” and wait for a “Quack” before I throw bread at it.

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