Relationships, like anything you want to succeed in life, need constant attention and care. And failure to attend to them regularly may lead to withering and eventual death. No relationship is great and healthy by default. There are things you must do and do intentionally before you can get to a level where your relationship will become the envy of others. When you do these things, you create the foundation for a healthy and growing relationship; because if your relationship isn’t growing, it’s stagnating or worse — declining. So, let’s look at few things you need to continually and intentionally do to remain connected in your relationship.
Affection is demonstrated through both verbal and physical touch. When you say affectionate words to your partner, you express love, desire, thankfulness, and appreciation. Also, words of affection will affirm your love and feelings for your partner. In a loving relationship, words of affection are encouraging and you must do it continuously to sustain affection. Then don’t forget the physical touch. Continually finding new ways to excite your partner will keep things fresh by the day.
Believing in your partner means to show that you see him/her as a competent and capable individual. And in a loving relationship, you are going to need lots of belief back and forth. That is, your partner must believe in you and you must believe in your partner. Believing in one another has a positive psychological impact on your self-esteem and on your partner’s. Nobody is perfect and nobody will get it right all the time. Performance-driven esteem comes and goes, but communicating belief in your partner regularly helps removes fear of disappointment in their endeavours, and the self-esteem that comes from it is massive.
Respect for one another is also very important in a loving relationship. A partner might feel disrespected when their values are violated, or when you don’t care what they think and you just go ahead to do whatever you want to do, even right in their presence. Men are guiltier in this regard, most of us can flirt with another woman right in front of our girlfriends, but we will complain and feel bad if our girl do as much as even acknowledging a smile from an admirer. Most of the time, we say “respect is reciprocal” and Laurence Sterne said “Respect for ourselves guides our morals; respect for others guides our manners” so, if you claim to love your partner, you must respect him or her, and the respect must continually guide your manners when they are there and when they are not.
Compassion is defined as a feeling of deep sympathy and sorrow for another who is stricken by misfortune, accompanied by a strong desire to alleviate the suffering. If you love someone, you will constantly provide support, empathy, and sympathy. When your partner has struggles with life or business or career, or hurts, or betrayal by friends, is not the right time to leave them to sort out things by themselves. You must give your time, your presence, and your comfort. Caring and comforting promotes relational security that helps provide reassurance for your partner that he/she is your priority.
Kindness is being friendly, generous, and considerate to someone else. If you are kind to your partner, you would be mindful of how you talk, and how the things you do, help them in their day to day life. And even when you are in conflict, remembering to be “kind” helps preserve the relational integrity so that you don’t go looking for things or words that will hurt your partner or bring them down. Kindness to each other can help you both to thrive.
We are all old enough to know that you will not always agree in a relationship. But having the ability to demonstrate understanding with each other is the key to acceptance of each other. Understanding will also help you to surrender. It doesn’t mean you have to give up totally on your views, but it means you are ready to be flexible and willing to comprehend your partner, thereby helping to create a harmonious relationship. If you cannot understand each other at all times, and you are both not doing anything about it, you might not have a need to stay in that relationship any longer.
In all, connectivity is a thing we must strive to sustain in our relationship. Once the connection is no longer there, whatever is keeping the relationship going will soon jump out of the window, and that will mean the end of everything in that relationship. So, whatever you want to do, however you want to do it/them; Stay connected, and stay safe.