Nikolai Talks (1) Boys Will Be Boys

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Nikolai Talks…

Boys will be boys

They say boys will be boys, so I guess girls will be girls right? What does that nonsense even mean? This is a topic that has been discussed over a hundred times but I must talk my own. In African homes, boys are primarily looked upon as the future heads of households and decision makers. Therefore, most of us expect to be surrounded by nothing short of intelligent and eloquent men. Unfortunately, that is not the case in the “real world” we live in today. I will talk about three things guys do when approaching girls that get on my last nerves. I expect men to use their common sense not only in educational institutions and in the workplace, but also in their daily activities and conversations. Keep on reading, because you might just feel the same way and you boys should read too.

  1. Wandering eyes

Take this scenario for example. Guys! What makes you think that you can ask my friend out and if she declines, I will gladly accept your invitation as second choice? Whether if it’s at work, in a club scenario or a regular day in the park, why would you think this is acceptable? Making such choices is fairly simple, because in the end, you MUST pick one! If you see two things or human beings that attract you, analyze them (meaning you should think very well about which you prefer) and settle with your option. It is very insulting when a guy can’t make up your mind and chooses to use me as a scape goat. I may do foolish things, but I am not a fool and you will NOT use me for example. Meaning whatever response you get from me, take am with a grain of garri!

  1. Current account balance

Whether if you like it or not, there are different levels in the societies we live in. Some people are more privileged than others and have a greater say in the community. If you choose to step out from your level, then you must be willing to accept whatever follows. If you know you can afford okada, why will you expect the comfort ability of a Mercedes Benz? Those men that like to occasionally pose as the mountain shakers and reigning leaders in town, I am calling you out! Why would you spend your last dime on the finest clothes, shoes, maybe even rent a car for a week when you know you haven’t secured your meals? You purposely will then go and seek the babe with the longest Brazilian hair in town, make up of life and latest designer handbags. It then comes time to take them out or they ask you for some extravagant gift and you try to get them to compromise…you dey CRAZE? What exactly do you think both of you will compromise on? Please remember what is in your bank account, what you can afford and what is not within your current means.  You cannot change someone overnight and to avoid their wrath, just walk away and don’t try it ever again. Everyone has their level, please endeavor to find yours. Harsh or not, it’s true.

  1. The “chilling effect”

The answer is NO! NO, I will not chill with you! If we exchange numbers and are texting for a period of time, I will expect nothing else but for our first encounter to at least be pleasurable. Whenever I see that disgusting chilling text, everything is over! “Wanna chill?” “Can we chill?” “Let’s chill at your place”. The answer is NO! I do not want to chill! What is a chill? I don’t know what has come over the guys of nowadays. Please adopt some old school proper manners and do the right thing. The right thing is evaluating my behavior, paying attention to a few likes/dislikes since we have been talking for a while, and planning an enjoyable outing.  I thought you said you liked me before? Take these scenarios for example. If the girl is a foodie, a typical dinner is boring. Why not try a blind tasting night, keeping it fun and exciting! If she is fitness oriented, why not try a new gym out with her to see the different equipment and exercise classes her current gym doesn’t offer? If she is creative, why not take her to an art exhibition in town to embrace various types of artwork from different artists? These are just a few simple ideas to put to practice.

The saying “Boys will be boys” should be extinguished. Yes, with a fire extinguisher. Guys have been given too many free passes and behave as they wish in most courting situations. Certain types of girls accept such behavior regardless of however they are approached or spoken to, but we are not talking about those girls. Men, if you are looking for an “authentic babe” here are a few things to remember when courting a lady. Respect a ladies choice, whether if the answer pleases you or not when you approach her. I am not saying you should allow her to belittle you, but approach the situation with caution. Do not live beyond your means to please a lady, meaning that you should be true to yourself and offer what you can. It helps when you make an effort to keep the “thrill” of knowing you going, Try new adventurous activities with your girl to keep her interest flowing.

Tell me that wasn’t a good read! Now let me know what you think.

 

Nikolai Obee

Ms. “Don’t use me for example”

 

 

 

Nikolai Obee

Nikolai Obee

Nikolai Obee (a.k.a Ms. Don't Use Me For Example) has a highly exuberant, but yet quirky personality. She’s a free spirit at heart and is constantly looking to broaden her horizons. She’s always open to others viewpoints and is an insightful listener, but never hesitant to speak her mind. Nikolai’s the typical girl next door, just with an animated twist! Follow her on Instagram @NikolaiObee Follow her blog @Nikolaiobee.blogspot.com

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