CAUTION!! NIGERIAN WOMEN ARE HIGHLY FLAMMABLE

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Haha that caught your attention didn’t it? Ok I might be exaggerating ever so slightly, but things are seriously getting out of hand in the make-up world. Something needs to be done.

Beware of the Nigerian woman at a traditional wedding, for the woman you meet there, more often than not, SHALL NOT BE the same woman you encounter at a later date. Best believe your next meeting shall be another first meeting. She will have to re-introduce herself. I blame the so called ‘face beaters’. Ladies ever so confidently upload photos on Instagram for example, with the caption ‘face beat by *insert Make Up Artist’s name*’. (May they not beat your face! SAY AMEN!)

You ladies need to tone it down abeg. (Lol. ‘Tone’. Bleaching or ‘skin lightening’ immediately comes to mind, but that’s another epidemic for another day). Whatever happened to ‘less is more’? I thought make-up was meant to enhance. These days, it’s a complete transformation. Come to think of it, maybe the whole ‘face beat by’ thing is accurate. People get beaten beyond recognition. Me I think it’s fraud sha. Misrepresentation! Jibiti! You see some ‘before and after’ pictures and you’re left looking like this guy:

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I’ve also had to cut down on hugging some of you at these events. Chop knuckle is better abeg. Chop knuckle doesn’t stain my white.

I guess what I’m getting at is that you ladies need to consider us please. Let’s do these things in moderation. Consider the foundation (lol) of the relationships you’re building (in terms of first time meetings). Let’s not build on a lie. Consider our shirts and suits. Don’t incur unnecessary dry cleaning costs for us biko. God bless you as you take these things on board, you beautiful, beautiful women!

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