READ: @Sir_Castiq’s Top Ten LIST of BEST Things IN 2013

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By 11:59 p.m today, I’ll bet sitting on the balcony; preferably with a  certain Jack Daniel but clear as water Grey Goose will definitely do. There will be fireworks. They will not be mine, I really don’t like loud noises, but they will be pretty. Bringing IN the new year with a bang. I like the sound of that. As the year rounds up, it is customary to have a bit of melancholy reflection about what we I liked about 2013 and because we both don’t like to waste time, it’ll be a list.
Here’s my top ten best things in 2013…
10) Gay Marriage Legalization
 They finally let them get married. Here’s why you should be angry about it. –> ” “.  Did you see what I did there. I wrote nothing. That’s right, if you aren’t gay it doesn’t affect you at all. If you are, congratulations, and what colour of tux is ok for the wedding? Wedding cake is wedding cake, no matter what sex the bride is.
 9)Marijuana Legalization
Potheads everywhere rejoice. I mean they’ve been smoking the ish for years why are they making such a bog deal out of it? Musicians and artists swear by the herb and it’s been shown to be far less of a health risk than cigarettes and alcohol. Add to the fact that it is largely non-addictive and you begin to wonder why it was illegal in the first place.
8)The Rise of Nollywood
I’m a huge movie snob. After watching Iron Man 3, the only reason the director is still alive is because plane tickets are so expensive. Come to think of it, 2013 has been quite a terrible year for movies. Movies like The Wolverine, Man of Steel, and that new Spiderman had trailers that made them more anticipated than the Second Coming. Only to disappoint me so hard, I’ll need Dangote money to pay a therapist to solve my trust issues. These movies were crap. However, 2013 marked the introduction of better story lines in Nollywood. Talented actors like Ramsey Nouah and Funke Akindele in collaboration with the likes of a good director like Kunle Afolayan are bringing a turn around to the industry.  Seriously, watch the Weekend Getaway to see Genevieve actually act as opposed to alternating between being a wooden cliché and a tear machine.
7)The US Government Shutdown
Our children are the leaders of tomorrow. We do expect them to grow up before they become the leaders though. The U.S government shutdown was pointless, childish and ridiculous. It goes to show that you are never too old to throw a tantrum.
6)GTA V
O ba gu. Undeniably the game of the year. A gargantuan environment, loads of side missions and plenty of pedestrian killing fun. I’ve loved GTA from the very start but GTA V is the Bruce Willis of GTAs. It’s back, It’s better and it dies hard with a vengeance.
5)Phyno
I can’t actually speak igbo but this dude makes me want to learn just so I can’t spit his rockstar flow with even more swag. Dresses like a rebel flows like a poet. Lemme quote him small. “2 years ago I introduced myself, now 2 years later they introduce themselves”. Bam!!” His epic collaboration with Olamide (Ghost Mode) and Man of the year firmly cemented his position as a rapper to watch.
4)Caro.
Everyone’s love, everyone’s boo. In the past years, Wizkid has become one of the biggest stars in the Nigerian Music scene. Caro is the love song Nigeria deserves. Girls today are all about the fun, the money, the swag, and the freshness. Wizkid’s Caro is the naija Uber Chic. Caro embodies what it means to be a young, sexy, and successful. Yeah, We’re all looking for Caro. She’s where the party at.
3)Jennifer Lawrence
If you haven’t yet, you should see Hunger Games. Smart, cute pretty and the future mother of my twins, Jennifer Lawrence is one hot mama to watch.
2)Arsenal FC
They say an Arsenal fan is the definition of faithfulness. It takes great courage to stand by your team through years of trophylessness and that definitely should earn you a place in heaven. Arsenal FC’s recent form has shown that God’s time is the best and even Pharaoh (Sir Alex Ferguson) must let my people go. Big ups to the team. I hope they win the EPL next year.
1)Jumia and Konga
Cheap, fast, available. Jumia and Konga have changed the Nigerian retail industry. It used to be walk/drive down to a store or market to pick up whatever you might need not with these retailers, everything is available from the comfort of your home. Add to that, the ability to use coupons and their frequent price slashes, plus no smart shopper buys anything without checking these two sites first. Giving street vendors a run for their rubber soles.
HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!
-Sir_Castiq
Redd-Berckley

Redd-Berckley

Aquarius, Sarcastic, Absent minded genius. Lagos born, raised all over the place. I love laughing, not always at people though. I love music, well when it's music. When it's 2Chains, you've lost me. Tech groupie, Gadget Surgeon, Professional Sceptic. Avid Reader. Girl Lover.

6 comments

  1. Now dats so funnnnnnny. chei.i liked the no 1 the Konga and Jumia things. dont mind dos Gay they will soon taya, when their ass stops performing the original function it was supposed to. then, they will know God wasnt stupid when he made it male and female. ungrateful ANIMALS!

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