The Thin Line Between Sweetness & Smothering

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Sometimes we love someone so much that we “overshow” our love and care that it begins to scare the other person away.

Its okay to love someone very much, in fact as much as you love yourself or in some cases even more.  What is not okay however, is that you love the person so much you begin to choke them while you exhibit your affection.

Let’s quickly discuss the thin line between being sweet and choking someone and how easily this line can be crossed.

When you send your lover a good morning text/message, its not a must he/she replies. A whole lot of reasons might not make them respond

A: they might receive the message pretty late and you might be asleep by then

B: they might not have airtime

C: they might forget.

Whatever the case may be, when you don’t get a response, wait until the next morning to ask gently.  Don’t go on to ask and bombard their cellphones with messages and calls immediately, demanding why they didn’t reply your messages immediately while you raise hell.

Do not make it a habit to “surprise” them all the time. Face it,  when you pop in to surprise them every other week at work, it becomes more than a surprise and becomes very annoying. Give them some breathing space, nobody likes to be choked even in the name of love.

Let them breathe, let them miss you. Stop the silly “surprises”.

Don’t push conversations further than the comfortable mark. Everybody has a point where they feel conversations are beginning to cross a particular line and is becoming uncomfortable.

When you ask about certain things and they don’t seem to want. To discuss further,  give them time and find out why later. Don’t keep pushing and demanding to know. It’ll irk them.

Whenever your calls aren’t being answered, do not become paranoid.  Don’t demand that they pick up immediately or you’ll rush down to where they are and don’t yell at them or accuse them when they eventually pick up. Allow them explain and take whatever explanation they give you to mean the truth. No need getting ideas into your head,  it’ll hurt you more than it’ll hurt them anyway. Because you’d be the one killing yourself with all the “what ifs” when you both aren’t together.

Learn to trust. A close friend of mine used to have to snap her location anytime she went out without her boyfriend. He demanded pictures to know where she was and who she was hanging with. That’s very ridiculous and choking. If you do this, with time you’d push the person away from you and they’ll run.

tomilola

tomilola

Content Writer|Screenwriter|Coke Addict|Feminist|Amala Activist|Future Hero. Twitter&Instagram @Tomilola_coco

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