The Crap women should stop taking

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It is appalling to see how women seem to have embraced the worst things tossed their way these days.

Before,words like bitch and ho were on a woman’s hate/never-to-be-heard list but it is jaw dropping how these days, even women call themselves hoes and bitches. Blame this on the heavy influence of hip hop on our generation.

Men seemed to be the only ones making women feel like crap before, but welcome to the age where even women join hands with men to reduce their self worth. I mean, We all know that one person who has been in a relationship where her partner was a selfish, lying and irresponsible cheat and this person never seems to learn as she moves on to the next lying cheat to get her heart broken, thereby further reducing her self worth/esteem.

If you know someone like this or if you are one like this, I think this article is for you.

Number One: NEVER agree to being referred to as a bitch/ho. I go on twitter these days and all I see is “hoes gon be like…” And then followed by something a girl would say.

Ever noticed that men don’t have a degrading and insulting name generally used for them? Yet they use it for women. What’s more disheartening is some young women actually attach these embarrassing names to their bio or bbm names. Forget that its 2013 and I might be old school but there’s absolutely no sense in that and there’s everything wrong with it!

Number Two: being the other woman. I had this girlfriend once who was dating this guy who had three of them in his life at the same time.

He wasn’t hiding it. She knew his other two madams and they all had their positions in his life. He had a sort of timetable for them all and he had the time he visited my friend and slept with her(without protection).

The sick thing about this stupid polygamy thing they had going on was that my friend thought she had it under control. She liked to tell us when we dared to be worried about her, that her heart wasn’t in it and she knew what she was doing.  She knew what she was doing yet she let him convince her to write assignments for girlfriend number two, she knew what she was doing and she was settling for less while he told her whatever.

She didn’t make him commit to her, she didn’t ask him to, she just supported his madness while he serviced all three of them in the same school(and oh girlfriend no 2 was in my friend’s class).

I know a lot of girls do this. And I know they think they have it covered, but you’d feel extremely stupid when he walks(that’s if you’re not feeling stupid already). Wake up and stop being stupid, stop acting worthless.

Number Three: Being just the baby mama. Before now, the term used for baby mamas around here was “After one”(or two or three, depending on the number of babies she’s had). That’s not a very pretty name neither is it classy. I don’t know if this was a general term in Nigeria, but it was a term nobody really liked to be called.

Fastforward to 2013, where women now willingly part their legs and get pregnant on purpose while they consciously settle for being someone’s baby mama.

I am not judging these women, I am speaking against the act that makes a woman thinks she’s good enough to be a man’s baby mama but not good enough to be his Mrs. If you can rock the baby mama title then you can rock the Mrs title. Most women watch their baby daddies convince them that the marriage will come later, yet these same men commit to fatherhood with them.

Here’s one bitter truth, its easier committing to marriage than fatherhood.

Number Four: Being pitched against another woman. Believe me, I thought this was gone with the days when superstory was the best series on television and MTN only had the best adverts but obviously, some silly women still allow themselves to be pitched against each other by men!

If he’s apparently lying to you two and you found out, why in the world is it sensible for both of you to try to kill each other?

Number Five: Sex Object. I mean in an era where being a nude video vixen is now as professional as being a lawyer/banker/writer/accountant/PRexec, one can only expect that men would now begin to see women more as sex objects.

Over the years, women have tried to fight this image but it seems to have become increasingly hard in recent times.

That’s because we willingly settle for it. We willingly accept it. We willingly give out our bodies and then begin to wonder why we aren’t being taken seriously.

Its time to have a serious rethink.



Content Writer|Screenwriter|Coke Addict|Feminist|Amala Activist|Future Hero. Twitter&Instagram @Tomilola_coco

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