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Ordinarily, I would not attempt an exercise such as this. However, I was listening to Toke Makinwa and Nanya Diali on Rhythm’s Morning Drive, and I noted the distortion the 100K story had undergone. Toke Makinwa had the pictures in front of her, and yet misrepresented the most critical portion of the saga. A stream of callers-in all toed this line.

See chat images below.
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Essentially, the girl has been made the supervillian of the saga, while the boy is only chastised for betraying the confidence of a private conversation. Toke’s narrative as well as countless others, is that:

  1. The girl offered sex for money.
  2. The girl wanted to charge 100k for sex

A perusal of Nigerian social media (the blogs particularly) today – chocked full of pedestrian idiots with soft heads masquerading as people who have sound opinions – will reveal that there is a shocking inattention to detail. That said, I now do think that perhaps actual sound opinions may not shift as many views as these landscape-polluting, malodorous blogs may crave. This is also a sad indictment of the mental capabilities of many of Nigeria’s on-air-personalities and I base this assessment on far broader foundations than this 100k issue.

I will therefore undertake an analysis of the conversation. In doing so, I will limit myself to the context of the conversation and only the context of the conversation. It must also be noted – and noted well – that I am not putting morals under scrutiny here. It is beyond me, as a human being no different from them, to attempt such an exercise. This is an exercise in academic analysis, purely and simply.

“Pls can u hlp a sis” and “a sis is broke she needs hlp” suggest to me that she was in a desperate situation and was willing to take “extreme measures” to solve her problems. This desperation and the amount she later requests for perhaps suggest that she is in dire need. What that need is, I cannot speculate. This, however, for me, is a clear case of “the ends justify the means.” If she was merely looking to whore herself out, the amount she charged will certainly have been significantly lower, because she might perhaps be familiar with an “industry standard”.

This girl must have also reposed a fair measure of trust and confidence in this fella before broaching such a topic with him, although I cannot deny that we humans baffle a lot of the time. The directness of the conversation suggests that this wasn’t the first time they were chatting. I acknowledge that a lot can go on in a first chat, but certainly not a plea for help out of the blues. This fella must also have posed as a boy (used in this instance for its negative connotation) of means; our girl would only have approached based on this assessment. I certainly do not know if the boy is rich or not; and in case it occurs to anyone to suggest it, I also do not equate the possession of an iPhone with being well-to-do. Let me stress again that I cannot guess at the state of the boy’s (or more likely, his parents’) finances.

Also note that it is the boy who brings up the topic of sex. He bluntly declares: “Are you willing to fuck for the help?” He has already decided what the reward for his benevolence will be.

Now note the response to the guy’s “How much do you want for the fucking of your life”. On one hand, it may be down to the girl’s conflations of the meanings of “want” and “need” that she replied thus. I am however more willing to speculate that it was calculated, and if not calculated, a statement of the situation she was in. She says “Pls I nid 100k”. Relate this to her initial submissions that she is broke and needs help, and you begin to understand her motives. We also see she is quite willing to get it over with as soon as possible – she does not mind coming over “tomorrow”, a “weekend” day.

Well, except his battery died or Airtel did the typical Nigerian telco denial of service, it can be seen that the boy clearly balks at such an amount. It takes him 4 minutes short of an hour to muster a response, and only after the girl prompts him again does he even bother to respond. What was shaping up to be mere fun-in-the -sun had become quite the big deal.

We may have been spared this speculation if our guy had not disingenuously omitted the most vital portion of the conversation – the girl’s response to “What do you need the money for btw?” I am willing to bet that this boy omits this portion from his screenshots because it does not serve his agenda of portraying the girl as bloodsucking whore. This omitted portion may have been the weight to swing the pendulum of public opinion firmly in the girl’s favour. Perhaps if he had not been so scheming, his publication of the girl’s motives may have even found this girl a good Samaritan, if it turned out that her travails deserved such an intervention.

Kayode Faniyi is a Lagos-based media practitioner who writes, as the spirit leads, out of kayodefaniyi.wordpress.com, and tweets, as spirits lead, from @Il__Duce.

Kayode Faniyi

Kayode Faniyi

I’m a balloon; the deflating sort. I fizz about. I’m @Il__Duce on Twitter, where I fizz about some more. http://kayodefaniyi.blogspot.com


  1. Thank goodness! Thought I was the only one who noticed the missing part of the chat (what the girl needed the money for)

  2. Hmm ok I can agree that both parties are at fault but I cannot buy the “ends justifying the means” argument. I think both are to blame because without buyers, there won’t be sellers. The only issue now is that the lady seems a more ready seller than the guys seemed a ready buyer. To me the guy is wrong because i think his intentions from the get go was to humiliate the lady. But ends justifying the means? So in order words sometimes it is ok to sell sex for money. I guess thats one of the peculiarities of our society and both guys and girls are to blame for that. If she had offered some resistance and had at first begged …

    But like you said we do not have the full picture. The dude waited a couple of weeks to post the convo so something probably happened within those 2 weeks. Personally I felt she was just using that guise to get in the door and had no intention of carrying out the act. Maybe that is why he got vengeful.

    I really hope we get past this idea that Sex is a valid payment type. I once had a discussion with a lady at why girls these days seem more interested in what is in a guy’s wallet than his heart. Her answer was that is what guys are offering most of the time. She gets approached a lot by guys and from the get go they are trying to let her know how “rich” they are and because of that, she feels other girls respond that way. I found that very interesting and quite true.

  3. Seems to me like the guy was just jobless and needed the attention that’s why the conversation photo releases …… For all we know it might even be a fake conversation I mean can we grant it’s authentcity ? What stop’s a group of friends from doing this and claiming another thing just saying …..

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