Hold it! Five things you should really shut up about

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Very recently, music superstar Dapo “D’banj” Oyebanjo granted an interview to Saturday punch during which he talked about his wristwatch and how exclusive it was to just him and rapper, entrepreneur/business mogul, Shawn “JayZ” Carter.

He also talked about the worth and all that and it wasn’t long before Nigerians took to social media, twitter especially, to express their disappointment and displeasure on his “bragging” and “blood getting hot”.

They felt he was going a bit too far, talking about how much his material things cost because nobody really cares anyway.

Let’s think about it, he’s rich, a music superstar who is known across the continent and who has broken new grounds recently. That means he is rich yes? And that means he can afford the very good life yes? And that means we expect him to have the flashiest/most expensive things money can buy yes? But it sure doesn’t mean we wanna hear him brag about them! Because we really don’t care.

Nobody cares how much your car costs, or how much your jacket is worth or how much money you part with to acquire your newest set of shoes. Nobody.

Now D’banj isn’t the only one guilty of this crime, many of us are also guilty of it. I know friends who would go on and on about how they shopped till they dropped on bbm or friends who would update every new accessory they get on their PMs and DPs or worse, the ones who visit a foreign country and who take pictures everywhere and everyday (making us wonder if they went there to take a photography course) and who upload them with captions like #DubaiChilling #LondonBridgeposing #Hollywoodtinz #LAshopping. It is annoying to read those things and honestly, it comes across as childish most times(if not every time).

Yorubas would describe people who make so much noise/brag about the material things they acquire as “Omo oju o ri ola ri” this simply means, people who are so impressed with little money and overwhelmed by it that they begin to brag about it.

Here are some things you really should shut up about, so you don’t go looking like a child to everybody. Because trust me, they wouldn’t tell you, but I am nice enough to.

NB: these aren’t only material things.

1. Your clothes or shoes or hair or car or whatever thing you just recently acquired: whether it is a whooping sum of 1million naira that got you that new bag or jaw dropping sum of 10million naira that got you your new car, please do not tell it to the world. Ask yourself, when you tell the world, do you feel better? Does it make them respect you more? Actually this is an answer to the second question, no. People lose respect for you when you go on bragging about your material things. So shut up, live your life without telling the world how you just blew money fast.

2. The place you just recently visited or are visiting: its okay when you decide to visit wherever you choose but it is NOT okay to visit these places and then decide to create a picture slide on bbm, adding PMs that are really nobody’s business or go to twitter and make so much noise about it. Remember you aren’t the first person to visit these places and you really need to chill.

3. The number of people you’ve been with: with the recent higher rate of western influence on Africa, I am not sure who boasts more about who they’ve slept with; guys or girls.  All I know is that, these days, it seems to be a trophy winning situation for so many people and they can’t wait to get on twitter to share nudes while talking about the sexcapades. Really?! This is appalling and extremely ridiculous! Sometimes I wonder if these people finish the act before even talking about it on social media.

We don’t care who last sucked your banana and how skilfully or badly she did it. Neither do we care about the last boy you got down with, it is not “fashionable” or “cool” to talk about it, so shut the hell up and keep to yourselves that piece of information.

4. The Lies you have told: I don’t know when being a “bad ass liar” became a really cool thing. I honestly can’t say. All I know is I woke up one morning and yeah, it was the coolest norm around.

It is bad enough that some people lie, it is more depressing that they share the stories of how cool they are with the act with their friends and the whole world every other time.

This is what sharing this type of information can do to your relationship with other people, it would make people trust you less and doubt whatever you say to them. They would also let every other person who they care about and who wants to trust you with anything know what type of person you are. After all you are a bad ass liar, why should they believe you?

5. How great your boo is: I absolutely am not saying this is how you should show your love to the world. I am not saying everyone should go low profile with their relationship, but the less attention you pull to yourself, the better for you both.

Women, if you tell your friends how amazing your boo is and all the special things he does for you, they just might get jealous and try out the good for themselves.

I have seen friends try it out with their friend’s lover. In fact, I knew of a friend during my school days who took over her friend’s man and they were all in the same class!

Guys, this goes for you also, talk less about your woman before someone else decides to see for themselves how wonderful you claim she is.

I know it is not as common with men as it is with women, but it does happen!

Learn to zip it and live life easier!



Content Writer|Screenwriter|Coke Addict|Feminist|Amala Activist|Future Hero. Twitter&Instagram @Tomilola_coco

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