Women,Let The Gold Digging Stop

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It is the Valentine season and most ladies are talking about the gifts they’d be getting from their men and “toasters”. It is the norm for younger women especially, to discuss the newest fashion accessory they hope to get from that special one or the lastest gadget(eg Blackberry Z10) they pray he would give them. The funny thing is they hardly discuss what they would give in return.

Now, this isn’t about Vals alone, it happens on birthdays, anniversaries, christmas and any other season that’s associated with giving(or not). Women prefer to be spent on than spending on their partner. I know of a lot of women who dream of nothing but the rich men that they’d carry his name and kids but not of their own success or future career. They’d rather latch unto his own dreams and riches not make their own dreams(if they have any that is) a reality. Should this even be?

Men might not be extremely particular about gifts but they love to be pampered as much as women. Let your man feel loved by buying him that thing he needs and he would respect and love you more. Give him everything, let him see how much you love and adore and respect him by even purchasing on impulse for him. I once bought my man a suit on impulse not because he didn’t have any or because he doesn’t have better but because I thought of him when I saw it. And guess what? He loves it and he likes wearing it all the time! The look on his face was priceless and I wanted to buy him more things that moment.

You shouldn’t just want things, you should be open enough to give. Men can’t stand tight fisted women, believe it or not.

Be independent. The thrill you get when you purchase your own stuff yourself is priceless. Do not live your life thinking like a gold digger. Yes most women claim they aren’t all about digging gold but that’s what they really do.live your life the way you would be proud to raise your daughter(s).

Be in charge for a change. Offer to pay the bills for once during a date, offer to fuel his tank sometimes, offer to pay for both your tickets at the movies sometimes. He would totally respect you for that and love you more, yes, quote me. Men are totally in awe of women who can hold their own, its a huge turn on for them. How about you give your boo a bit of that? You don’t have to earn a hundred thousand to even do it. How much are movie tickets again? You can do it. Start now.

Use this Valentine season as a period to buy for your man. Isn’t it more blessed to give than to receive?



Content Writer|Screenwriter|Coke Addict|Feminist|Amala Activist|Future Hero. Twitter&Instagram @Tomilola_coco


  1. This is an excerpt from the book Act Like A Lady, Think Like A Man by a male author Steve Harvey…Chapter 2 sub-topic: Provide, pages 27 and 28 .”Some men even label any and every woman who expects her
    intended to provide for her the very handy, decisively ugly
    phrase gold digger. Oh, when it comes to women, that phrase
    gets tossed around these days like dough in a New York City
    pizza parlor. In fact, men have set it up so well that we’ve got
    women thinking that if they remotely expect a man to pay for
    their dinner, or buy them a drink at the bar, or set any financial
    requirements for their man, then they’re gold diggers.
    I’m here to tell you, though, ladies, that the term “golddigger” is one of the traps we men set to keep you off our
    money trail; we created that term for you so that we can have
    all of our money and still get everything we want from you
    without you asking for or expecting this very basic, instinctual
    responsibility that men all over the world are obligated to
    assume and embrace. It’s a “get-over” term, ladies—one that
    has a very legitimate premise (there are, of course, women who
    date and marry men solely for the cold, hard cash), but one that
    has been wrongly and almost universally applied to any woman
    who has made clear that she expects her man to fulfill his duty
    as a man. Know this: It is your right to expect that a man will pay for
    your dinner, your movie ticket, your club entry fee, or whatever else he
    has to pay for in exchange for your time.”

  2. Hi Uju. I have read Steve Harvey’s “Act like a lady, think like a man” a couple of times and I dare to say I know the book well and it is one of my faves. I also have read and I av tried to understand Steve Harvey’s written thoughts. At no point did he ask women to be selfish. If you really understand this article, it says, women who don’t have dreams or whose only goal in life is to settle with a man who can buy them a future. Of course your man should provide for your needs but does that mean you should never reciprocate? Where is that written? Agree with me or not, but if your man doesn’t get the pampering from you and he gets it from some other woman out there, he’d be “wowed” by it. Men love it Uju. They do! If I had come of as saying u should be in charge of the finances then I’m sorry, what I meant was, do it once in a while as well. Not everytime. I mean we’d love it if our man helped with the cooking in the house right? Doesn’t mean it is his job but it will make us happy and love him more. Look @ bey for example she bought Jayz a private jet sometimes last year, Kimk bought her man, Kanye a car on his birthday. They love it Uju, let’s do it once in a while. Thanks for your comment.x

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