We all wish we had that extra confidence to rock the beautiful peplum dress or Jimmy Choo heels we saw at the mall. We even sometimes secretly wish we had Omotola’s skin or Genevieve’s charms or maybe, maybe even Kim Kardashian’s amazing bod.
But those people also have their confidence battles. They have their own way of telling prepping themselves or grooming their self esteem. While I’m not here to reveal the secrets they use(trust me I would if I knew them), I can suggest a few trusted confidence boost(s).
1.Believe in you
Nobody can believe in you as much as you do. You are the only one who knows how far you can go and how high you can reach. How about you believe and work towards it?
Jennifer Lawrence was Oscar nominated for Winter’s Bone and has the starring role in Hunger Games. When asked by Cosmo magazine how she did it her response was “None of my friends took me seriously. When I announced I was moving to New york, they kept waiting for me to fail. But I was like, “I’ll show you”.
And she did it.
2. Pick yourself up
When you miss out on a job or get disappointed by someone you trust so much, the blow is usually one that sends you staggering or sometimes, falling. The key however, is to pick yourself up. Refuse to be bitter, refuse to be discouraged, like Aaliyah said, “Dust yourself up and try again”
3. Make your own rules
We often keep waiting for the “right” opportunity to do something and most times, the “right” opportunity never comes. Create your own opportunity, bend rules and make them work for you. Be willing to get up and create doors to knock on. “Where there’s will, there’s a way”
4.Turn Setbacks into success
Who says you would never fail? Who says the road is smooth? Who says the road to success is without obstacles? Show we anybody like that and I’d show you a blood money maker.
Sometimes you start businesses and setbacks happen, it is okay. All you need to do right is try again and don’t stop this time until you are successful. Don’t hide your head under a pillow (well maybe for a few minutes) forever. Take that situation and with confidence take control of your business/career.
5. Flex your muscles
You are at that event where you’re supposed to anchor or present an award or you are at a family dinner where you honestly know everyone except a few faces but you are not a crowd person and so you start to feel nervous and have sweaty palms. Your confidence level has dropped drastically and all of a sudden you can’t speak a straight sentence in english.
What do you do?
It is very easy. Direct your thoughts somewhere else. Yes, you have a room full of people staring at you, concentrating on you and taking in your every detail. Well, imagine they are not there or think of something you love doing. It works! Jennifer Lawrence did it before appearing on the legendary chat show, Letterman. She beat her nerves by concentrating on something else. Yes, just like that.
6. Take your time
Do not be spontaneous about major and important decisions. Do not do things on impulse, take a deep breath and even sleep on it. Yes. You want to buy that pair of beautiful heels and you have the extra money for it but honestly you already have a closet filled with lots of them and you don’t exactly need them. Sleep on it and if by the next day you still feel the urge to get them, then maybe you can.
7. Don’t compare yourself to other women
It is very hard not to pitch ourselves against our “too perfect” friends/mates. It is worse when those friends seem to be doing amazingly well in their relationships/marriages/work and things aren’t so bright for us.
But that’s the wrong way to live life. In fact, a very dangerous way to live life. Be yourself. Do not compare. “Comparisons are a product of insecurity” says British actress Felicity Jones. Do not be insecure, be your own woman. Even men love those!