So, You’re Stuck In The Friendzone

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You just happen to be crazy about a guy who can’t seem to stop seeing you as his “little sis” or “one of the guys”? We’ve all been there. And yes, it sucks! I mean, he’s a great guy and you have an awesome friendship, but it would be totally awesome if you took your friendship to a whole other level, right?

Now, you’re trying to figure out how exactly you can stand out and get him to see you as a woman he can be with intimately. I’m not claiming to be an expert, but here are a few tips you could try.

 Have Some Alone Time: Whoever this guy is, the first thing you need to do to get him to really notice you, especially if you both usually hangout with a group of people, is to get him alone. Hang back after all your other friends are gone and ask him if he wants to do something together, like maybe lunch or drinks. Or, ask him to help you fix something. The point is to get some one-on-one time with this guy you like. The more little incidences you can engineer that involve just the two of you, the better your chances will be at getting him to see you as someone who’s more than just a friend.

 Bond Over Common Interests: You guys are friends so you should have an idea of the kind of stuff he’s into. Even if you don’t, you can ask your mutual friends. Find out what he likes, what he reads, and the kind of music he listens to, that sort of thing. Use this information to give yourself a leg up in your conversations. Does he like dogs? Show him pictures of your dog and regal him with funny anecdotes. Does he like the same music you do? Then compare playlists. The more common interests you find, the easier it’ll be to bond with him outside your group of friends.

Stand Out: as we’ve already established, chances are this guy sees you as just another one of his friends. This means you need to start putting more effort into letting your personality shine brighter and distinguish you from the masses. Speak up more; make him laugh, be the center of attention, anything short of being obnoxious, really, so he realizes you have an individual personality that would be worth getting to know.

Hiding your real character around him in a bid to appear mysterious is never really a good idea in these kinds of situations. It’s always more advisable to be yourself.

 Flirt: Yes, you have to flirt with him. But I’m sure you already knew that. You’re probably just wondering how. Some guys actually don’t know when a girl is flirting with them and so you need to bring some serious game. Touch his arm when you’re talking, laugh at his jokes, and establish eye contact from time to time. What you’re doing is creating the illusion of a special connection and it shouldn’t be long before he starts to respond.

Dress to Impress: It’s possible that your friendship may have caused you to get comfortable around him and you’ve let yourself go. If this is true, then you need to shape up. Show him how well you can clean up by making a conscious effort to look your absolute best around him. Nothing too dramatic though. You’re trying to make him see you in a refined light, not scare him off or gain a scholarship to clown college.

 Be Honest about Your Feelings: In the event that you’ve used up all your ammo and still get no response, you’re going to have to take the bull by the horns and just straight-out tell him how you feel. Granted, it’s risky and you might not get the response you want to hear, but at least you finally are certain where you stand with him. In an ideal world however, he should be thoroughly flattered and impressed by your honesty and ask you out on the spot.

While I hope these suggestions work for you, I have to say that it’s not such a terrible idea to focus on the solid friendship you have. In the end, he’ll appreciate you more for that when he finally realizes how into you he actually is.



Cece is a Journalism major with an unbridled passion for writing. When she's not saving the world with her magic pen, she writes fashion pieces; features on numerous blogs & writes gibberish that people are forced to read on her blog

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