I do not have anything whatsoever against younger guys dating older women. For the people who do it, I believe they have reasons…. Reasons strong enough for them to do it!
I have seen situations where an older girl has dated a younger guy, I even have a friend who’s done this before but honestly, it is not my thing. I am a girl who is quite hard to control and I believe when I’m with a younger man, I might have problems being reasonable or maybe worse – respectful. So I do not encourage younger boys coming on to me. But then I guess I can’t stop this from happening.
Recently, my cousin had a baby and we all went for the naming ceremony. Because I am not the type that mixes freely, a lot of people who know me try to be careful not to make ridiculous introductions and I never even give room for it. In fact most times, I naturally frown.
While at this ceremony, there was this guy who kept staring, following my every move with his eyes but then since he didn’t move close or try to make conversation, I just thought he was admiring maybe. Besides, I was too hungry to focus on whatever he was trying to do. I desperately needed the rice and chicken (well, yes call me long throat but that was one of the major reasons I went there).
A short while after I got to the ceremony, my phone battery died and I went somewhere to charge it. Then my little cousin of about eight years, who had been with me all the while, came in to tell me the same guy who I had noticed staring at me was asking him annoying questions about me.
He said “I told him I don’t know you when he didn’t want to leave me alone“.
I laughed as my cousin Tofunmi said this. I laughed because of what Tofunmi said to him and because I was expecting the guy to make some sort of move.
He walked into the room at that point and Tofunmi whispered “ehn ehn, that’s him Aunty Tomi. That one with jaga jaga hair” he said pointing at him from where we were. I looked at his head and laughed. My little cousin was referring to his Mohawk which was quite rough.
“Thanks Tofunmi” I said and dismissed him. I could handle Mr rough Mohawk from here.
I started looking at the guy and he didn’t for once return the stares I sent him. I noticed he glanced when I wasn’t looking and that was the first time I knew whoever he was, whatever he did, he wasn’t my type of guy. I like bold guys not ones who can’t look at me when I look at them.
After staring at the guy for a while and watching him interact with others, I deduced a lot of things. He was not bold enough, he was not mature and he most definitely was younger. Don’t ask how I knew this. I just knew. And I was right!
A short while after, I left the room where I was charging and returned outside to do one of the most important things I came to do at the party – eat. When I was done, an older cousin came to me and asked that he wanted to see me.
Then he said “erm Tomi…that guy over there has been disturbing me all day. O sope oun fe ba e soro.”
I looked towards the direction he was pointing and yeah it was Mr jaga jaga hair according to my little cousin. Then I smiled. You agree with me at this point that he’s not man enough yeah? Because no real man would ask another man to call his object of interest for him!
Out of respect for my cousin, I nodded and accepted to sit down with this boy and listen to what he had to say.
Then Mr Jaga Jaga marched across the room like he ruled the world, like he was someone who owned the type of body Chris Hemsworth has; then he sat down before I did, didn’t ask me to and after a few seconds he said, “Sit down now“.
I laughed inside and literally said to myself “eleyi o ti mo nkan kan“.
I sat and he asked “what’s your name?” I replied “you didn’t remember to ask for that when u were begging for the hook up?”
“What?” He asked and when he noticed the cold stare I sent his way he added “anyway, let’s talk.”
“About what?” I liked to know
“The reason we are here” he replied
“I don’t know that reason”
He fidgeted. “You don’t? Ok. Let’s talk about ourselves. Don’t you want to know me?”
WTF?! That was it. I don’t know what got into me but I asked this next “how old are you?”
Now as much as I didn’t know why I asked this question, I honestly didn’t expect him to answer. But he did. “21” he answered. And I laughed, genuinely laughed.
“My immediate younger brother is 21. But then that’s not the issue” I started “the issue is that you don’t even know what you’re doing. Let’s leave it at that please. We aren’t age mates”
“How old are you? 30?” He asked now very uncomfortable. I could have slapped him across the face with that and insulted him but I said instead
“No. I am not. But I’m older and too smart for you – For this!” Then I stood up. “Hook up with teenagers.” I added “I did this only out of respect for my cousin. Stay out of my way” then I stormed out of the room.
And he sure stayed out of my way till I left.