Coco’s Chronicles: Miss Wannabe

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Hey guys! I’m back from my “sabbatical leave“. LOL! Missed you guys plenty, the comments – Nice ones and hilarious ones, the ones I get on here, the ones I get on twitter and the ones I get in person! Y’all the best! Anyway, I’m back and this time around I’m filling you guys in about something that happened over a decade ago. Might be boring abi? I bet you are wondering how this concerns you or even fits into the present but here it is…

Quite recently, I ran into an old classmate, we were in secondary school together and she was one of those girls who liked boys and showed it while we were all still too shy to show it and she never really had it good with her female clique of friends. And to make it worse then, most of the boys she liked never really liked her back. Some were nice enough to still talk to her in class and escort her to get lunch during break period but most of them never really cared.

When I saw her recently, she was all grown and pretty (Just like me LOL). We hugged and kissed (on the cheeks/forehead. Yeah, I’m 100% straight) and she went on and on about how long it had been, what she was up to now, how great life had been to her and how amazing she was at everything she does. Now, that’s not a biggie but for someone who wasn’t in anyway close to me back then and who hadn’t seen me in years I thought it was a little too much to talk about. She flaunted her bag (which I’m sure is 100%fake) and talked about her hair and all.

Boy was I bored! And of course I had to act all interested! After a while, when I noticed her true life story wasn’t ending anytime soon, I tried to excuse myself.

Desperate to end her story sometime soon, she offered me her numbers and BB PIN. Now just to be rid of this girl at that point, I took her contact details and left. As I left, I wondered why some girls felt living like this made them any better than they were? I remembered that this girl had always, always been the type to flaunt nothing in particular since we were in secondary school. Ever since she was a little girl!

Let’s call her Lola. Lola desperate to be noticed as a little girl told too many lies while she was in school (of course we didn’t know they were lies then). And for girls like us who were barely noticed then it felt like a dream to hear her say all she said. Her parents had to be rich and must be some sort of kings where they lived. She must be a princess! We wished the tales could be ours! We wished that was our lives!

Then one day, Lola’s bubble burst and our princess dreams that we saw through the eyes of Lola faded.

One of Lola’s numerous crushes “crushed” back on her. Kingsley was the neatest boy in our JSS1 set, his uniform was always neat, his trainers never had a smudge of dirt on it and he spoke with a slight American accent. His holidays were spent outside the country and we heard once that he could travel in the morning and come back in the afternoon if he felt like it. Of course we believed it! And we also all crushed on this adorable good to be true boy! And when we heard he liked Lola, we grew kinda jealous but what could we do?

They held hands and walked along corridors during free periods and break time and Lola was always laughing out loud (sometimes I was sure she didn’t get the joke sef). Then one Friday, Kingsley asked for Lola’s number so he could call her at home and Lola gave him.

When we got to school the next Monday, something surprising but highly interesting happened. There was Lola without Kingsley. In fact, there was Kingsley with another girl!

Apparently, during the weekend, Kingsley called the number Lola gave him and the line was picked up from UCH. Kingsley had tried many times and he was sternly told at some point to stop disturbing the peace of the hospital. Kingsley then asked one of the girls that knew Lola (and were jealous of the relationship) and she told him Lola’s home didn’t own a phone! And of course some other worms were let out of the can!

It was hilarious when we heard this and the fact that Lola had been wrapping us all around her little chubby fingers all the while with untrue stories. It took a long time before the story went away.

It is funny however, to see that Lola of 1998 is still the Lola of 2012. The ridiculous tales some people tell even when it’s not needed!



I’m a totally simple, sweet, funny down to earth girl. Extremely fun and nothing of an introvert. I’m so much into writing, I don’t have enough space left in my heart to love something else. I’m addictive and you’re not likely to let go once you know me. Twitter handle, @tomilola_coco


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