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Greetings mortals (think I’ll stick to this).

Guessing the title sounds rather controversial huh?  Sorry, but its only the truth (subjective of course) I speak … if you are modest, a prude or just plain irritated by the thought of sex? Please just close the page now… till my next sob story or scroll down.

It’s funny how many people I know and how many people I think don’t know me but most that do usually have the common idea of me – She’s single and been single.  Now yes, it has been a minute since I have bestowed that title of boyfriend on someone but one question I always seem to get asked is (PG version) “So you saying you have had cobwebs since your last boyfriend?”

What I don’t get is – why does sex for a girl have to be tied to a boyfriend or husband? I’m sorry but some people have forgotten what love is… they’ll just take the sex. That sufficient physical contact is enough to keep them going till the “love” comes… till then, GIRLS, WOMEN, FEMALES, have needs too.  SHOCKED? I know!

Really,  I am so tired of labels in this society.

It’s funny how for a woman to be able to have sex with someone with no strings attached, to some, she’ll probably be deemed as “cheap” or “easy” or probably a “ho”.  Don’t get me wrong, there are actually PROPER ho-es out there, the ones who sleep for money, the ones who shag like it’s a marathon. SOMETIMES women just sleep with some men because they have no idea where the next LAY is coming from… That’s the TRUTH!. It’s just “stocking up for the winter” really, until the constant comes. A woman always ticks these things. Ok:

ü  ·      He has a fairly nice body;

ü  ·      He isn’t rude, he respects me;

ü  ·      He is coded, he won’t tell his friends- very important;

ü  ·      He has a nice smile (optional);

ü  ·      He showed interest so it means he likes me;

ü  ·      I’m fairly in control;

ü  ·      O.k I’m attracted to him enough.

This is enough for her to get laid and forget what happened the next day and if you play your cards right… She’ll choose you as her shag buddy; I don’t think men understand they get used too.

I’ll give an example- my friend paid for a hotel room for this girl he had been sleeping with. She lives on campus but the plan was he would pay for a hotel room because it will be more convenient for him than driving to campus; It was meant to be weekend sex with a side order of chilling. Thing is she came with her friend, who ALSO lives on campus. Now my friend was VERY sure he was getting nookie that night. I asked him “so you paid for a hotel room for this babe and you believe it’s for you and her to spend the weekend, YET she brought her friend from campus which is 40mins away to stay? PLEASE I BEG OF YOU! Who is using who?” My friend just realized he had been played for a sucker and no he got no nookie because he had been cock blocked. The girl wasn’t interested in the chilling/love part; she’s been getting/giving the sex and has now collected her payment for continuously “dropping it like it’s hot”.

Honestly, from research from girls and other blogs, I have found that some women mostly enjoy non-emotional sex or sex with someone they  THINK they’ll never end up with but they know and very comfortable with, MORE than with a committed partner. I guess its something about it being less pressure, nothing much to lose and best thing is you can picture whoever you really wanted to be with anyway… all by switching off the lights. The morning will come and there’s no pressure of “Will he leave me because I didn’t pop that ass higher in the air?”… NO! Its just about that passion you both shared THE RAW, unemotional, uninhibited passion.

Women be VERY wary of men who can’t have unemotional sex!  They lie to you and make you think something else is coming out of this perfect synergy both of you just shared in the bedroom. Some men need to like a girl very much before they can sleep with them and they have a list too:

ü  I need to be able to have a conversation with her;

ü  She needs to pretty;

ü  Attractive assets;

ü  She’s fairly naïve but still a strong person;

ü  Last, last she’s attractive.

You can spot these men too. They hang out with you in public (around other people not necessarily clubs), they “talk” to you before the deed -listen to your “hectic” day for like 2 seconds, pretend they want to watch a movie before you know your clothes are off, you meet their friends etc. BUT IT NEVER GOES ANYWHERE PAST THE SEX that’s just all it’s going to be for him- FUN. *sigh*

I keep saying this – Understand the relationship you are in before you start putting your heart on the line and hear the “I’m not ready” speech when in realization – he never wanted anything more… just your body. To men who do this- I know they seem like a rare breed but there are women out there who you don’t need to seduce and lie to; they just want the sex… that’s all.

Men please, you need to understand that sometimes a woman doesn’t just want to be made love to, she just wants that raw, passionate, pull back my hair, back me up against the wall, tell me howdirtyIamsex. We aren’t all delicate flowers that have to have their gardens attended to with delicate care… bring on the shears and make the cutting dirty.

I know some girl/woman in a long-term relationship or a man is reading this piece and thinking “Oh my, I’m sorry for this writer”– to him or her I laugh and say please don’t be; I’ve known “love” and I’ve known what passion is too. I am just a woman who knows what she wants and speak for other women who feel so too.

Forget about inhibitions and be you; life is short. Don’t be scared to say- “I’m no expert on love but please feel free to give me the devil I know…sex.”

This has been a public service announcement.




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  1. LMAO @ “So you saying you have had cobwebs since your last boyfriend?” part because it got me to read all through. I agree with Will because most girls are actually scared to say what they really feel about hitting the sack with a dude and most guys freak out when they meet a girl that wants sex…alone. I like girls fit into the picture you painted and i’m that kinda guy in the picture too *covers face* but then again, scratch that. An enjoyable read with valid points all through. Good one!

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