Have you ever tried to write and you deleted everything you’ve written more than 3 times? Well, I just cleared mine again and hoping I don’t get to clear this fresh one.
I’m currently on holiday and I promised myself not to write/tweet anything serious but I have been summoned to write.
So, yesterday I heard a news that broke my heart and I want to know how you feel about it.
So Segun and Ego were dating for 6 years until last week. They started dating when she was 25 and he was 26.
It was that sort of relationship everybody envied and some of their friends were already saving for the wedding proper.
He promised her marriage and she gave him all her love. Her parents didn’t disturb her about getting married, they were only concerned that he hasn’t proposed yet but still everybody waited knowing that she’s given him 6 years of her life.
Last month, Segun travelled to England and got married to Biodun. A lady his family introduced to him about a year ago.
To make matters worse, when she confronted him, his only excuse was that “His family wanted a Yoruba wife”.
She gave him 6 good years of her life. She’s 31 years old and newly single. I’m sad because he did not even consider breaking up with her first but went behind her and got married.
He played the tribe card and allowed 6 years go down the drain.
Some of you reading this have been in long term relationships and for some, there’s no hope of a future. I think people should be more truthful to their partners and let them go when there’s no ‘future-together’ in sight.
Talking about letting people go, when I realised there was going to be no future between Ada and I… freed her. I could have kept her but that wasn’t necessary since I wasn’t feeling her like that.
However, before I update you on Ada, I guess it would be nice to conclude where I stopped the last time and then move into the future.
May 22, 2011
For some reason I felt sweat on my palms and it’s not like I usually sweat on my palms but the situation at hand was in control and I had no control.
Zoba: Oh okay, we’ll wait for you.
With Chisom out of the way, I knew I had little time to either hand over my phone or start a mini unavoidable war with Zoba.
It was not like I was hiding anything but I don’t close my chat windows, so in some cases, you may see about 300 open chats.
The truth is, apart from the people I talk about here on memoirs, there are others I may be setting ‘P’ with on BBM and some of them are meant to be one night stands or mere “flirting”.
But as you know some of the conversations might be too graphic for a wife-to-be.
I didn’t want to give in without a fight.
Nobs: Nne, I guess you don’t trust me and now I have to hand over my phone to prove that I am serious about us or maybe that Biola is just a friend.
Zoba: It’s not like that but the way you are going about it now makes it all look like you’ve got something to hide.
Nobs: I’m not putting up a fight. It’s not the first time any woman is asking me to hand over my phone. The first time, she didn’t ask, she just picked up the phone while I was having my bath.
Zoba: What happened?
Nobs: We were just friends at that point and I was considering going a bit further with her until that evening. We came to mine so I could change before going to the movies with her. I went into the bathroom and when I came out, she had my phone with her and said “Blackbarbie sent you a message and she called too. I asked her to call you back”. Not only did she read my BB messages, she also took my call.
Zoba: Anyways, Nna, please hand over your phone.
I gave her my phone.
While we were waiting for Cha to dress up, Chidi got a call from Vanessa to come pick her up and without thinking twice; he raced to the car and zoomed off.
We went down to my car to wait for Chaa and that was when Zoba opened my phone and started reading my messages.
Chaa came to the car and immediately she saw my phone with Zoba, she became silly.
Chaa: Nobs, are you sure you can drive?
Nobs: I don’t understand?
Chaa: I‘m just concerned. I pray that we don’t crash because I don’t see you concentrating while Zoba is with your phone.
Nobs: I have nothing to hide.
Chaa: Igba ndi Nsukka. Aga aju onye?
Nobs: You know we really don’t have to go anywhere with you.
Chaa: I can go back upstairs but you may need tissue when you start crying.
Zoba: Chisom, ina acho ya okwu.
Chaa: O sorry ooo.
Nobs: What should we do?
Zoba: You decide
Nobs: Maybe we should go to SWE Bar for Karaoke and then De Marquee for drinks.
Chaa: I’m working tomorrow oooo
Nobs: Okay. Maybe we should just do SWE and then Zoba’s hotel and then home.
We got to SWE Bar and instead of picking a song to do, Zoba stayed on my phone and her facial expressions weren’t encouraging.
The entire night I kept thinking about whose chat I left open and how much trouble that could bring me.
I don’t know about you but there are people you only flirt with and nothing more. No intentions of taking it further than that. I had one or two of those and I usually leave the chats open just to remind me where we stopped the last time.
It was one of the longest 2 hours of my life with occasional “hmmm” sound effects from Zoba.
On our way home, Zoba asked that we drop Chaa first and then I should pack something that I will wear to work the next day.
I knew I was in trouble but I was also sure I was going to survive it because she asked me to pick up something to wear.
Throughout the ride to her hotel, she didn’t even say much.
We got to the hotel and then she said it…
Zoba: * handing the phone over to me * I saw a lot of rubbish but we can really move on together from here. I will not tell you who to take off your BBM but I will also expect you to know who may lead you into trouble and on your own accord, get rid of her or them. I accept that this is a new life for us and I only took your phone to know the number of people you are currently fooling around with.
Nobs: I’m sorry.
Zoba: You’ve done nothing wrong, Nna.
Nobs: I will do the needful.
Zoba: I won’t check again. I will take your word for it.
Nobs: You are different from a lot of girls that I have met in the past. Thank you for believing in me. Trust me, this is not about sex. I do care about you.
Zoba: Really? How long can you hold out on sex with me?
Nobs: For as long as you wish!
Zoba: You tell me.
Nobs: Let’s do 8months.
Zoba: Okay. Nna, idikwa serious
Nobs: We are on. I need to show you how much this means to me.
Zoba: You are a charmer.
At that point, I knew I wanted Zoba for life but I wasn’t sure about staying off sex with her.
NB: I will move into the present next week.