FRANQUE’S relationSHEEP: Technically

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About her I have written before, but as with most aspects of my life I share, I share only the parts that are pertinent on the day.

I was in my final year when we met. She accosted me one evening after lectures, she wanted to make enquiries about a membership drive I had talked about and as I was on a number of committees, I went off on a tangent before she pointed out my mistake.

I did not see her again after that day, and probably would not have remembered her, but on a visit to one of my academic advisors there she was.  “Look at who I have been looking all over the school for,” she said getting out of her chair.  I looked over my shoulder then back at her, trying to place her face and failing.

When she mentioned the group, I remembered.  That did not stop me stuttering an explanation to the lecturer who turned out to be her uncle.

A few short weeks later, we became an item.  We went almost everywhere together, and people treated her special: students because she was my girl; lecturers because of her uncle and her guardian who, between them, wielded an influence not to be sneezed at in the school community.

Then one day , I was summoned to her uncle’s office.  He had heard one of his wards was dating a student, but had only just confirmed it was this his sister’s daughter.  I walked in there apprehensive, but after plenty talks, done mostly by him, I accepted he was only doing his part and looking out for his niece.  I calmly got up, without a look in her direction, dusted the seat of my pants and walked away. I made a conscious effort to hold my head up and walk straight as I left him bellowing and thundering at her.

He banished her to the staff quarters, there to stay with her guardian and I was forbidden from seeing her.

That was on Thursday.

On Monday, I was recalled to his office. “I see that what you both have here goes beyond me,” he opened. “I have decided to allow this your friendship, but on the condition that you will be fair to her, and treat her with respect.”  I nodded, got up to leave, and then he added “Consider this what a man goes through when he is in love.” I smiled at him, put my left hand in my pocket and sauntered out of his office.

A year later, I came to pick up my NYSC call-up letter when I met her uncle at the school chapel. After his good wishes he held my hand clasped in his palm, looked me straight in the eyes and said, “Don’t forget your friend.” Uncomfortable with this kind of scrutiny, I told him I did not plan to forget anybody.

I was posted to Northern Nigeria and I went gladly.  Mobile phones were not within my reach, and there was no cyber café in my school then. We relied on NIPOST for communication, then I up an e-mail account for her but she only checked it during the holidays when she travelled to the big cities.  I have no recollection of exactly when it happened, but one day I woke up and we had drifted apart.

The next time I saw her was four years later, and that was because an old school friend of mine ran into her and told me how we were not over in her head, especially since we did not officially break up.  As I was between relationships at the time, I did not mind the reunion.

While she had not changed much, I had.  We did not seem to share the same interests anymore.  We did not even have a lot to say to each other.  It was awkward, the reunion.

Again we drifted, and again I carried on with my life.

Over time though, she became my fall back girl. Whenever one relationship ended, I tended to dig up her number and talk with her in the hope that… I don’t even exactly know why.  One thing I have come to realize is, she’s still the same and whatever we had back then was valid only for back then.

So, when in September I decided my one year of ‘mourning’ my last relationship was up, and I was ready to open my self up to the prospect/possibility of love, her number was not one I called.

Problem though is, she called me up on the 22nd of September, the anniversary of my father’s demise, like she has done every year since 2000 when we met.  She calls me on every birthday in my house – Mama, my siblings – and on any date she feels is important to me.  One of my friends at whose wedding I was the best man still gets calls from her on his anniversary – I have to struggle to remember the date!

Listening to Bez’s “Technically” playing off my Blackberry, and knowing the story behind it as he told it, I knew I should tell my story too; this story.

PS: Last night I had the worst case of nerves I have ever had in a long time. I was going to be on radio. Ok, not me really, just something I wrote. I was cool with that because the presenter of the programme was going to read it, then I learnt I would have to call in and be asked a few questions on LIVE radio!

Let us just say I spent the better part of last night on the porcelain throne. Then it was time and there was nowhere to run/hide.

“Hello?” I said tentatively when my call was picked, the next thing I knew, it was over – and I survived it! If you missed yesterday’s edition, follow me on twitter for updates as to when the next one will be happening.

I once heard that one often meets destiny on the path he takes to avoid it.  Destiny or not, I am embracing my here and now, and with it, all of you who have helped me grow this past year.  Y’all know iLove you, ryt?.



"Franque is in aviation, which by the way is not his job, just a lifestyle. If he ever kept a diary it would read like his articles will. Unfortunately he doesn't. Scratch that. He didn't.AIRtiquette is a walk in his shoes. Since regular isn't in his vocabulary, brace yourself for a bit of airwalking!" Follow @franque_521 on twitter.


  1. If course you love us, we’re the best there is 😀
    As for this girl, I feel sorry for her. If u have not ended things formally, you should. Most importantly, she sounds like she’s a good/nice girl… She shouldn’t be your fall back girl…

  2. Good story, wish iWas within dstance to hav bn abl listen in ystday. Poor grl tho… And technically, yu might stl be her one true love o.

  3. …Awwwww. I love you too Franque. Hehe. I love Zite more tho. :p

    Sooo.. The radio thingy, is it regular stuff now? Cos I missed it. 🙁

  4. I want to listen to you on radio.
    Please break up with this girl formally,don’t let her keep having ideas of what’s not.

  5. “So since we never broke up officially, then Technically you’re stil my baby”
    Franque, Just maybe ……

    Like iAlways say, iEnjoyed reading!!

    The radio show last night was Breathless… U were Awesome….Sexy and all… #NoPsyches! You, The Post and That Song….Beautiful! Can’t wait for the next one 😀

  6. “So since we never broke up officially, then Technically you’re stil my baby”
    Franque, Just maybe ……

    Like iAlways say, iEnjoyed reading!!

    The radio show last night was Breathless… U were Awesome…. You, The Post and That Song….Beautiful! Can’t wait for the next one 😀

  7. Wt is it dey say abt good gurls and coming last? *sigh* Truth is most tymz pple change nd so do feelings.. All those yrs apart, somthing has got to give.
    And as 4 ur radio show so those ov us outsyd of gidi dnt get to be a part ov it abi? Issorai! God dey!!

  8. Hey family, how are we today? SUPER is my hope. About the radio thing last night. iWasn’t too sure it wuld happen. iHear it’ll happen more often now, kinda like a Franque’s Chronicles – at least that’s what iHave heard. To 2day’s post, let me just say here that while iEnjoy all the sides and the plenty advice; and while all the stories are my stories, they are also your stories. Do feel free to share with us if u or someone u know has this same technicality issue.
    @ ibetapassmynebo: congrats! iSee u r tied in 1st position tho with Jazz (it’s a TECHNICALity)
    @ Kay: U already know what iThink of sed bird. Quick one tho, this voice in ur head, is it tellin u to do things? Slap ur boss perhaps..?
    @ nengie: She’s no longer my fall back geh, she’s not even my geh, period. Who’ll help me tell her tho?
    @ Uk: iAm gettin u…
    @ Jazz: wassap BAWSE?
    @ smallz: with any luck, u myt hear me again soon. As for my technicality, who knows 2moro?
    @ nena: #CougarAlert;
    @ MaBijo: iWish it were that easy. Sometyms u just don’t wanna be burnin bridges. Tryin to gently ease her out of that mindset tho;
    @ Lorlah: Should iBe afraid of u? iHav seen ur original comment n it reads lyk u r settin P, so iAsk again: shoul iBe afraid of u?
    @ Everyone_else: for the nxt 2 weeks it’ll be AIRtiquette fridays to ease us into my birth month n inch us closer to my birthday. Y’all hav fun.

  9. grrrrrrrrrrr( screaming), jeez, on my way home last night, the radio was on 98.1fm and the presenter was reading a piece from a certain Franque, it crossed my mind that it might have been you but i didnt pay much attention to what she was saying, after a while, i just turned down the volume. If I had known twas u, would have paid more attention….Great piece tho, its best you let her know u have no future plans with her…

  10. Ah yet another touching one, I feel you on the technically and mine is way more complicated in that I don’t seem to know how to let go and neither does it but it still seems like we are unable to hold on permanently either 🙁 (ps I don’t know if that made much sense outside of my head).
    As for the radio show, aww why the nerves, glad it went well though. Any hopes for those of us not in lagos catching it sometime? Lemme know.
    Great job as always and of course, we are absolutely nuts about you as well.

  11. Franque dear,’break up’ with the kele officially. Remember that dream of yours?? ehn ehn u get the pisure lol. Me i’ll claim first from my part of the world :p.

    You know we love you too. Keep up the good work and yea follow me back on twitter jare :p @merdip

  12. Had a madt day 2day,so am really late, but just had 2 drop dis. A̶̲̥̅♏ glad 2 learn U̶̲̥̅̊r a nov baby cos we rock!!!

  13. As always…..reading u gives me chills, thanks 4 sharing……I think we al have that fallback guy/girl…..goodluck with urs or whoever u decide is good enuf 4 u…..well done and goodluck on d radio gig, missed out on d 1st one but I’ll b sure 2 keep my ears and eyes open…..

  14. Awwww, U really need 2 tell her wassup dude! D truth is always d way 4ward n d ealier d better. Thanks so much 4 sharing.

  15. *Snort* As if you had a choice not to love us!!!…I love your delivery every time and even though I don’t know the story behind”Technically”, your story by itself makes sense

  16. nice work- buh i Was a lil lost along the “P.S part”——couldn’t relate the relationSHEEP story to tha radio event.

  17. @ Lorlah: ok, now iKnow;
    @ Miz O: iWas that ‘certain Franque’. There’s next Thursday;
    @ T.L. Bridges: iKnow that feelin. It is what it is. How do we write our DUEt if iDon’t hav a way of reachin u?
    @ Mercy: Next chance iGet, iAm breakin up with her – officially;
    @ Moore: We sure do rock! When in Nov is urs?
    @ temmie: iAm almost certain she will be told in 2 weeks – when she calls to wish me a happy birthday;
    @ Still in love: Let me just say here that iAm not as choosy as all that. U kno what iAm talkin about;
    @ t: My post was on radio. Me iWas @ home lyin in bed :D;
    @ HoneyDame: No choice o, and iAm happy for that;
    @ Cee Jay: Thanx for ur comment n ur observation. The thing is, the PS is just dat: a PS.

  18. You should be able to see my email address (or someone in 360nobs should). Shoot me an email with your pin (sorry I don’t wanna put my pin on here) and we can go from there, again, twould be such an honor.

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