Femi is a good friend of mine who believes double dating is fun. While he doesn’t support polygamy because he considers marriage a sacred contract, dating is a casual affair therefore the commitment level is very low.
Femi wasn’t always like this; he had been hurt in the past by the one girl that held his heart, and I suspect still holds a part of it. She left him shattered, and I was there to help him through the phase. In time he reset and healed, but the Femi to rise from the ashes was a changed man. Only dates two chics at any given time and even dated three friends once. The former lover boy had evolved into a player – a player with a conscience.
I noticed the new Femi had developed certain qualities that aided him in pulling off this precarious act. I consider it precarious because not everyone can double date. Believe me it’s a dangerous game – sort of like walking a razor’s edge. Femi, who couldn’t conceive a convincing lie, became a revered liar. He became so glib, he’d weave a web of lies effortlessly without shooting himself in the foot. I’ve come to realise that some girls are quite gullible and, what’s more, they love being lied to. I know because I’ve been straight with most of the chics I’ve been with and it hasn’t gotten me anywhere.
Femi had always been cool but wasn’t usually calm in highly emotional situations. His ex-girlfriend exploited this weakness and turned his life upside down. Tears were his kryptonite. At the first sign of tears, Femi’s emotions took over and usually did the thinking. She knew this and used it like a Lex Luthor. Whenever she was wrong or did something wrong she’ll flare up and Femi, not knowing how to react, will begin to pacify her; for the fear of losing her troubled him.
With the departure of this girl from his life, Femi developed a calm and level headed disposition towards women. Even if a babe were to cry blood, the new Femi will remain calm and objective while carrying out his (usually rational) decision. This new quality helped him deal with crazy situations in his life especially when chics found out they were being played. This calmness and suspected unpredictability threw them, so babes usually behaved themselves.
Femi picks his babes carefully. He realised the psychological mindset of chics was an important aspect of the double dating process. A good knowledge of their temperaments helped him pre-determine how the relationship will pan out, and the safety (or disengaging) measure he needs to put in place in order to remove himself when things went south.
He would say “You can’t treat every girl the same”. He never dated over-pampered chics, or desperate babes. They were too ‘needy’ and ‘clingy’. Neither did he date ‘spiri kokos’ nor dewey-eyed babes. These were too deluded.
The combination of these 3 qualities enables him to double date at will and with a remarkable peace of mind. For Femi, double dating is likened to a game of chess. “You must be two steps ahead of your partners; You must be a pre-emptive player and not a reactionary one; and You must be able to identify impending problems and side step or resolve them.” He would say.
It’s clear that double dating isn’t for the faint hearted.
Note: If you’re a bad liar and can’t think on your feet, and you date every Tina, Dupe and Halima, or Thomas, Dotun and Hafiz and still in the game, you might want to re-evaluate your position and quit while you’re ahead.