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I have quite a number of friends and they include a lot of ladies. My ‘girlfriends’ always pour their hearts out to me when they get heartbroken and I lend my shoulder for them to lean on. I console and advise them but at the end of it all, time is what heals their wounds. Recently one of them came to me in her time of ‘need’ and as usual I did all I could but then she posed a question- Why do guys cheat on ladies? This question required careful thought so I pondered  before I came up with answers.

To some schools of thought, lust leads to love. A guy first ‘wants’ you before he loves you. He likes what he sees and that’s what draws him to you in the first place. Its when he comes to you that he finds out your background and gets to know your character and personality. So, after you put him through your ‘tests’ and the feeling of love is mutual make sure you treat him well and give him a ‘reward’ in bed or else he will RUN. Men are just ‘sophisticated monkeys’; they love sex like all other animals. They see sex as the ‘ultimate’ reward so your refusal to give it to them makes them feel unappreciated.

Some men are very greedy. These men believe their sole purpose on earth is to sleep with all the women in the world. They can undress a lady all covered up like an eskimo with their eyes. It’s just their nature. I’m sorry if you have a man like this but there’s nothing you can do to stop him from cheating. He may always come back to you but the ‘cheating blood’ flows in his veins. Even when he’s with you, he’s still thinking of other ladies. All you can do is monitor him with a GPS and set up CCTV cameras everywhere because he’s not going to stop at anything.

‘Once beaten, twice shy’– some men live their lifes around this adage. For every action, there’s equal but opposite reaction. They have been badly hurt in the past by ladies and believe all are the same and won’t give any lady another chance. They have sworn an oath to themselves never to get hurt and instead decide to punish ladies for what they’ve gone through.

Another set of men exist who take actions out of fear. They are scared of getting hurt and suffer from ‘fear of the unknown’. They feel their girlfriends go haywire once they are not with them so they decide to cheat on them since they claim not to know what their girlfriends are up to.


There are the set of men who are not happy with their girlfriends’ characters. Maybe these girls are lazy, dirty, can’t cook, demand too much money or just have a way of pissing them off and as such they see cheating on them as a way of getting back at them instead of confronting them outrightly and trying to resolve the problem.

The last set of men are those who cheat on their girlfriends for money. YES, male prostitution does exist! They just find a chick or a sugar-mummy to sleep with for her money and more often than not they spend the chick’s money on their girlfriends.

These were the reasons I could come up with for my friend. I’m sure there are loads of other reasons that you readers know so feel free to share those.

Some men are actually very ‘holy and righteous’ and as such all these does not refer to them.



Your friendly neighbourhood guy who believes himself BLESSED not LUCKY. I would always say it as it is without mincing words. A walking jukebox. I believe I was born to serve God and others. My column - Kaleidoscope. Follow me on twitter @keyedamola


  1. Women cheat too sha. That’s anoda topic. As a lady, i av seen all d shapes n sizes no matter how they like to come off. But neva in my life av i seen d last group of guys. I pray neva to do so sha. Gud writing, though.

  2. All these xcuses sound lame in my opinion. Cheating is second nature to men. They can’t help it,whether married or single. They tell u variety is the spice of life and Men are polygamous by nature. The society also condones this behavious as a man is measured among his peers by his number of conquests. If a woman is found cheating,she is a slut. But the man,he is a stud. It is really an unfortunate act,which has no solution in sight. The annoying part is dat dia partners are actually prettier n sexier than those they cheat with-most times anyways. For all intent and purposes it just goes on to show that they can neva be contented with wat they have.

  3. Seriously, I’d say Guys cheat coz its like some inherent property embedded in d Y chromosome.
    I used to tink it was a ting of our generation- recently, I had cause to go back in time n do some research. Cheating men have been around dear world. As far back as the old testament. Heck my grandpa even cheated on my granny…
    I’d love to justify their reasonsn but errytime I try 2, I fail. All u cheatin douchebags…come out n tell us y u act d way u do.

  4. guys cheat women cheat…and u can analyse it all you want but it is in the human nature to disappoint and never truely be satisfied. if u love someone and d person cheats on u, i bet u’ld feel bad and all but don’t be too judgemental cos you most likely are cheating or may cheat on him if not sexually, emotionally.. people will fail u n u will fail others, the most important thing is what you do after that happens.

  5. Correct answers..I think most men cheat bcos it makes them feel fly..it also gives them something to brag about at the usual playas round table conference on friday nights..if not then wot? Even if ur a drop dead gorgeous mammy water,they will still cheat,even if the “reward u give him in bed makes him sing the Nigerian anthem in swahili, he’l still cheat.wot pisses me off most is when a guy marries a slim babe and cheats on her with miss flabs..WTH do they really want…total indiscipline. for some ladies who get cheated on,I think its just nemesis catching up with dem bcos u can’t date another womans husband and expect to have urs to urself in future…heloooo ever heard of karma?I once had a bf who could do a 360 with his neck once he sees a lace wig go by.he was a horrible cheat and actually told me d odrs were just f**king materials and I was his wife..tales by moonlight mtsheeeew.the only solution is divine intervention from heaven o

  6. well you havent hit the nail on d head……….i dont see anything meaningful or helpful in ur articl…….thanks sha ,atlist i read sth asides the memoirs…..

  7. FEISTY’S COMMENTS ARE HILARIOUS! “As a lady, i av seen all d shapes n sizes no matter how they like to come off”….REALLY? ALL ‘SHAPES AND SIZES’? WHERE DO YOU WORK FEISTY? KURAMO? HAHA

  8. Pple b disturbin me wit whether men cheat n why. Stop askin rhetoric questions jor. Is it not females they cheat with.
    As usual d whole issue stems frm d females. U control urselves n there will b no male cheats again.
    The cheatin option wud mean turning gay!

  9. Wow wow wow,Cream nice one you made me laugh almost thru reading,but nevadless ure true to a large extent.A line I once heard“show me a beutifull woman n I will show u a man dat is tried of f**king her”.Wen I heard dis I thot abt it deeply n realise it is totally true. Yes women do cheat but d men,u can never compare.But I ask again,y do dey cheat?n yet we re not allowed to.truely any man dat surely want to avoid it as to be a brother to disipline.Or how do u say abt a guy dat calls his girlfrd a cosin to others? Men,they are surely a case study dat can hardly be solve.

  10. @feisty, thanks
    @maanadee, your comment was reflected in the second paragraph
    many nice comments and ideas from you all. Thanks

  11. Nice, really good. But like I always say,der r many questions we should not bother asking cos from time immemorial der has been no answer and unfortunately, there will neva be

  12. The person that sat down and blamed women for men cheating is not serious lol. A person that cheats is selfish, ladies o there are men that don’t cheat. Do not let society sell you this thing that all men cheat. There are men that do not cheat. That is not to say temptation does not exist, it does but there are some disciplined men. Men, stop letting people liken you to a dog that humps everything, you are a higher animal; you have the ability to control yourself, stop being so lazy.

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