“There’s no romance without finance” a babe once told me. From that day on, I’ve considered this statement a cardinal rule in relationships. I’ve discussed it with many ladies and they keep saying it’s BS that love is all that matters. I know ladies reading this write-up will disagree with me and believe I have a shallow understanding of ladies. Money isn’t the ultimate goal but it’s the means to achieving our ultimate desires (think about it).
Any lady that agrees with this premise will be considered materialistic (aren’t we all) but the fact is that it’s a rational philosophy. I’ve come to understand that people will prefer to hold on to their idealistic notions than face reality (reality is cold). Money is crucial to nearly every facet of our lives and so is love.
Some ladies have the fairy tale concept of love and the happy ending scenario (thanks to novels, poems and movies) but love in the real world is a different ball game. No average naija babe is ready to date a guy that can’t meet her needs (believe me, these needs are numerous).
Which babe wouldn’t like a romantic getaway or to be showered with gifts and presents (I’m not talking low quality gifts o!). However, all these lovely things cost money. Many marriages (the serious version of a relationship) are in shambles today due to the lack of money. If a marriage might not be able to withstand the storm of financial turbulence how will a simple contract like a relationship survive (where commitment is low or non-existent).
In the 21st century, ladies aren’t the only ones going into relationships because of money or have it as a criterion. Even guys prefer to date rich girls, it is believed and has been tested, she will provide for certain needs. While the rich girl will see love, the guy only sees money. Dating a babe with a strong financial foundation is quite different from dating a babe that will at one time depend on you financially.
Many guys have lost their girlfriends to rich guys likewise ladies to rich babes (but this is rare). Even the Yoruba people have an adage to support this line of thought: “Olowo lo ngba iyawo ole” i.e. It is the rich man that steals/takes the wife of a lazy man, lack of money is attributed to laziness.
Today, you’ll hear ladies say “I can’t suffer with any guy or I can’t marry a guy that’s not ok”. I don’t blame such ladies; the women of the 20th century are a testament to this. Many started with their husbands from the scratch and were afterwards discarded when the money came. Even parents advice their female children to marry guys with deep-pockets and if not deep, someone who’s financial stable (who can blame them) who doesn’t want a rich in-law?
Romance built on a weak financial sub-structure is heading nowhere. I won’t blame ladies who consider finances as pre-requisite to a relationship or marriage (everyone must look out for their own interest but remember it’s not all about the money). To the ladies who consider finances a lesser requirement and believe that love conquers all I congratulate you. To the guys reading this, if you don’t have the cash now you’ll have it soon (don’t worry) and to the guys with the cash make sure your babe isn’t with you all because of the money.
The fact is making a guy’s or babe’s present financial standing a major criteria for a relationship has its disadvantages while making it a criteria but a minor one has its advantages.
Now I pose the question to you “Can there be romance without finance?”