The Potent: Lifestyle Of A Single Banker (5)

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I am doing pretty good, considering my circumstance ( no man; to love cherish and treat me like a woman). I have great friends who have been there for me; at work things are looking up for me and I have been approached by a new magazine called ‘**********’ to run a column for them. Everything seems okay, it’s just the fact that I have no man and my biological clock’s slowing ticking that gets me really worried.

I have started contemplating going back to my ex, swallowing the small pride I have and going to beg the living day light out of him (not sure what it would achieve, but I had to try). It’s just that, the dude thinks I am the devil himself. He doesn’t want to hear or even see my name in whatever he does (not that I blame him anyway, I had broken up with him 3 times).

I have had a couple of advances here and there, but dudes these days want to be friends with benefits, with no strings attached what so ever. Plus they have their main squeeze they always go home to (hmmm, use someone else’s future wife but leave your own looking fine and dandy). Michael the artist I ran into was all up in my grill, but he didn’t want anything serious as well but he was happily single. While Asha, another dude I ran into while waiting for a cab to get to work, wanted me for the same reasons, but he had a girlfriend of 3 years (hmmm, what a wonderful world). Then there was Oghogho, an ex of a before before. I dated Oghogho when I was in my 2nd year in university, we had a funny relationship but it seemed to suit both of us at the time. I broke it off with him during my service year and recently got his updated CV.

He was married, had two kids and now, he just got a job at my bank (what!!!) I wanted to crawl into a hole and hide. The relationship ended long ago, but the wounds still felt a bit fresh (stories for another time). For the job, I had to get along with him. We had lunch, went home together, hung out a couple of times and gisted generally but (there is always a but) he wanted more (huh!!!). I never failed to put him in his place, cause I had no interest whatsoever in a married man, and that feeling wasn’t about to change. Since I only wanted it to be platonic, Oghogho backed off a bit; instead we started talking about his conquest and some of mine.

Not like it was a competition but he always came out tops, having a string of women in and out of the office.  I couldn’t (still can’t) understand how ladies will willingly shag a married man (although I almost did). Aside my mixed feelings, I always wondered how he got that lucky! I attracted married men that wanted a fling, single guys that wanted benefits and dudes that just weren’t my type while he attracted all sorts of babes. Hating to admit this I was totally envious of him and wondered out loud why I was getting the worse treatment ever (had I been cursed). At church, which I had started going regularly (cause I was determined to rid myself of the term single banker) I listened to the sermon and each word sunk in deeply. When the priest asked for us to forward our prayer request, it was number 1 on my list, when he prayed for singles to find their partners, mine was the loudest Amen (#teamloudAmens) and when it was time for thanksgiving, I danced the most to the altar. But I still felt empty! (Why me Lord!!!)

This last Sunday, I was pretty reluctant to go to church, but I got up and went for the last service of the day. During the service, I listened attentively to another sermon of praying consistently and never getting tired of asking from the Lord. We prayed, had thanksgiving and the choir seemed to be in high spirits so I totally rocked to the choruses they sang. At the end of the service, on my way out of the church, someone stopped in front of me and said “Hello, I loved the way u sang the choruses…” (it’s a miracle, my prayers have been answered!!!).

Baby Dee

Baby Dee

Baby Dee, a highly sexy, sumtimes physical n yet subtle lady; has her eyes on 1 thing, finding d right guy. Risen in her professional career 2 a job she enjoys in a bank she refuses d tag ‘Single Banker’. 'THE POTENT’ is Baby Dee’s personal diary of dealings with people of opposite sex n how these experiences shape her.

12 comments

  1. girl one advise!
    I think you should stop thinking about your situation
    its like youre almost obsessed with getting a man
    unexpected things happen when we dont think about it?
    Now youve added spirituality into the mix,Ill say pray about it and let go
    youll soon be pleasantly suprised.

  2. Nice story….but I guess u missed the good guys while you were younger and still having fun…too much dangerous fun..and u’v been a little too free with sex.its neva too late,u seem like a smashing woman…but don’t get ur hopes up on church brothers..their horns are tucked under a hat and their tails r deep in their pants….marriage will come when it comes….let Go and Let God..since u av become spiritual(genuinely I hope).

  3. Em why is everyone talking about answered prayers doesn’t mean she finally found a husband. Besides she’s beginning to sound too obsessed about finding a guy and it’s making her sound like a broken record. I thot your experience at the club would have taught you that there are some crazy people out there.

  4. Hey Peeps, are we missing the point? Its not all about finding a husband oh!!! Its about finding the right guy. if marriage comes, praise the Lord!!! If not, the search continues. Do you know any treasure hunter that stops searching for treasure, so why do you peeps think i shouldn’t go the extra mile to find mine.
    Anyhoo, i appreciate all comments, they are truly words of wise people.
    #bighug#

  5. Such jonzing of the highest order!!!
    BabyDee, it ain that hard to find a man.
    A guys always deal their best hand, always.
    its like bargaining.
    He’ll only offer what he thinks you are worth.
    its never an insult, he’s just checking you out.
    friends with benefits,f#*k buddies,Married Guys…its all the same. make a counter offer, tell him to offer “better” ’cause you KNOW your are better.

    God will never give u a man u are not ready for.
    Prep ur self. live your life. Quit looking for a dude.
    its not even right, let em look for u, but u gatta be worth looking for.
    desires and desperation can be smelt a mile away.
    no guy wanats to be tied down.

    and that church fanatasy….i laugh!!! Worst Place for your type.

  6. Such jonzing of the highest order!!!
    BabyDee, it ain that hard to find a man.
    Guys always deal their best hand, always.
    its like bargaining.
    He’ll only offer what he thinks you are worth.
    its never an insult, he’s just checking you out.
    friends with benefits,f#*k buddies,Married Guys…its all the same. make a counter offer, tell him to offer “better” ’cause you KNOW your are better.

    God will never give u a man u are not ready for.
    Prep ur self. live your life. Quit looking for a dude.
    its not even right, let em look for u, but u gatta be worth looking for.
    desires and desperation can be smelt a mile away.
    no guy wants to be tied down.

    and that church fanatasy….i laugh!!! Worst Place for your type.

  7. Hey,

    U almost slept with a married man or you slept with a married man? Read your earlier articles and u’ll see where u confessed that earlier. Is this fiction? Its too early to start mixing ur stories up o. This is the 2nd mixup in 5 articles.

  8. Oops, my mistake. Sorry…I made the error. Last comment is false. I apologise. At no point did you mention sleeping with a married man in your previous articles.

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