MEMOIRS OF A SLU…shhKID: WK26(CONTD)

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So, Wednesday(This was submitted Wed evening by the writer – apologies from The Editor for late publishing 🙁 ) is finally here and guess what? I woke up, had my bath and drove all the way to Ikeja before I realised that NLC was supposed be “striking”.

Anyways, I ended at Orchid Bistro for some butter cookies and Ifedia.  Truth be told, most of you are not really interested in all these stories as far as you are concerned you are here to finish the concluding part of the Memoirs.

Saturday, November 6th 2010

Dear Diary,

When I got the text a lot of things went through my mind and the first thing I thought of doing was …

To call my mother and narrate the entire discussion with Ada

or

Buzz Uncle SD and ask for his opinion on what I was supposed to do.

I was very scared and had no where to run to ‘cos my international passport has expired and I’ve not had the time to go get a new one.

On a second thought, I felt I had no reason to be scared.  If she had done something to herself the fact that I wasn’t in the same room with her should prove my innocence unless they approve it from the remote control. For people who don’t know or have not heard about “remote control”- it is a jazzing method where the “Jazee” control and inflict pain, illness or kill the “jazzed” from any location without any physical contact with the “Jazzed”. I don’t believe in it but a lot of folks do.
Anyway, decided to do the most important thing- Confirm details.

So the call comes through….

Mama Ada: Hello, Chibuzor, Kedu?

Nobs: Odinma

Mama Ada: Onwere ife nmelu? Did my family do anything in particular to that you found so difficult to let go that you have to pay us back this way?  I called you and begged you to decide what you want from my daughter and up till this minute you have not come forward to say anything, yet you’ve decided to hurt me and even hurt my daughter more. Hello, are you there?

Nobs: Yes ma.

Mama Ada: Did you know that some people came to ask for Ada’s hand in marriage today?

Nobs: Yes ma

Mama Ada: And what did you tell her to do?

Nobs: I told her to accept and marry after all it’s the wish of her family.

Mama Ada: Asi.

Nobs: Ezi okwu

Mama Ada: You didn’t tell her any such thing. You told Ada not to marry Okechukwu.  Chibuzor, let me ask you, Will your family repair our leaking roof? Will your family complete the roofing of our new house? Do you know how much we spent on Ada education? Have you ever bothered to know how much we spend on monthly medication as ndi okenye?

Nobs: No ma.

Mama Ada: My family is not materialistic. Tufikwa! But Nna, nwa anyi ka ene anyi nka.We are not getting young any more and you cannot be enjoying the warmth of city girls while you leave our daughter in Umuomaku waiting till thy kingdom come for you.

Nobs: Mummy, I never asked her to wait.

Mama Ada: Me che onu(Shut your mouth). Onye bu mama gi?

Nobs: I’m sorry ma.

Mama Ada: I think I need to speak with your mother. You are nothing like your parents. You should be ashamed of yourself? Ndi age grade gi have all married and you are advising another person’s daughter to leave a more promising and serious young man.

Nobs: I did not advice to do such a thing.

Mama Ada: Asi.  Ada walked out of our visitors crying and calling your name. Ibu onye? Eh Onye ka ibu?

Nobs: I’m sorry about that, Ma.

Mama Ada: She’s in her room and wouldn’t talk to anybody. Why are you doing this to our daughter?

By this time, I was totally confused and disturbed. I may have over reacted but there was no way I was going to be blamed for making Ada put a stop to the proposed marriage. I was sure how far I wanted to take it with Ada but marriage? Erm…not yet.

Mama Ada: Are you there?

Nobs: Yes Ma. Were Okey and his family offended?

Mama Ada: If they were they didn’t show it. O maka gini?

Nobs: I’ll speak with Ada.

Mama Ada: You did exactly the same thing we spoke

Nobs: Yes but work took over and I forgot to get back to you.

Mama Ada: Nna, biko Ejim chukwu ario gi. Please leave Ada alone. If you are using anything on her, please free her.  I’ll fast and pray about this and believe me, God will listen to the prayers of an innocent woman. Your own wife will come when you are ready. Ada nwam, aburo nwunye gi.

Nobs: I’m so sorry for all the trouble and pain that I’ve caused your family. I’ll talk to Ada and hopefully she will see your reason and leave a no-good boy like me for a more promising young man.

Mama Ada: Yes, I said so.

Nobs: I‘ll call her now, ma.

For a moment, after the call I was a lil bit confused and stunned. It made me think about my life in a full circle kinda way. Am I really that obviously-a-good-example-of-not-promising young man? I thought hard and sat down to review my life and the few women in it. Maybe, I should really consider going serious with just one of them but if it takes one woman to make a man great then three women should produce a Samson.

I quickly called Ada

Ada: Hello, Buzor

Nobs: Ada, why are you doing this?

Ada: I’m sorry. Please forgive me

Nobs: Nne, oya stop crying oo?

Ada: Ooo

Nobs: Why did you walk out of the meeting?

Ada: Buzor, it was too much for me and I felt I saw Okey looking at my breast. That made me feel bad. Imagine you are not even interested in me and he was looking like he wanted to marry me just for my body.

Nobs: Hmmm

Ada: Buzor, please I don’t want you to leave me.  I don’t want to be with any other person but you.

Nobs: Ada, I’m not ready for marriage now and your parents want you to marry.

Ada: I’ll wait for you, buzor. I’m ready to wait.

Nobs: Nne, your parents need a grand child and a helper in form of a son in-law.

Ada: Buzor, lets move abroad and get married.

Nobs: Ada, let’s not do something we’ll regret later. Let’s think this through and make a proper decision.

Ada: So, what should I do now?

Nobs: Meet with your parents and agree with them.

Ada: Can I come to Lagos during the public holiday or will you be working?

Nobs: You can but first, settle with your parents.

Ada: Buzor, you know I love you, right?

Nobs: I love you to bits and will always do. Now go and meet your mum.

Ada: Okay, buzor. Please remember to eat ooo.

Nobs: Would do…

I was glad that I was able to convince her to go see her mum but I wasn’t so sure of the Lagos public holiday visit.

Dear Friends, this is the point I really need your advice.


Wednesday, November 10th 2010

Dear Diary,

Like I said earlier, I had to go to work because I’m efficient like that but when I realized there was no work, I turned back and made my way to Orchid Bistro instead for some good issh.  On my way back, I decided to play my normal prank on Slim, so I BBed her.

Nobs: Yo Babes

Slim: Hey hun

Nobs: You at work?

Slim: Yup!

Nobs: Been a while

Slim: We seem to be catching up only on BBM oo

Nobs: We should change that oooo.

Slim: Totally

And few minutes later I walked into her office.  Slim came out looking all kinds of sexy in a mad way and that got me thinking….maybe I should really consider taking it to the next level with Slim. We caught up on several things and I couldn’t stop looking at her lips (In a friendly way sha).  I stayed a bit but had to leave cos she was at work but few minutes out of her office I got a BBM from her.

Slim: Nobs, you want to eat Ghana high?

Nobs: Cool

Slim: Rice or beans?

Nobs: Rice, love.

Slim: with Dodo?

Nobs: Yes

Slim: I’ll let you know when your food is here so you can start coming.

Nobs: Okay, babes

30 minutes later, Slim informed me that my food was ready and I drove back to her office for lunch. (There was no traffic, thanks to NLC).  Lunch with Slim was fab and maybe Slim is the one, maybe not but I’m very cool with our friendship.

Parting note: I would love to get serious with just one person and make this memoirs about her.

This convo with Mama Ada and Ada herself threw me down memory lane, and as you know due to my life as the SLU..shhKid, i have forgotten a very important detail(can’t blame me, can you) and i’d like you to help me.  The incentive is that you get a VIP ticket for the upcoming SMVA(Sound City Music Video Awards).  I am actually giving away 10 of these tickets so i need 10 people to answer correctly.

Question: How did I meet Ada and which week on the Memoirs? (10VIP tickets to giveaway to 10 people).

Please post your answer in the comment box and you shall get a reply from me.

Noble Igwe

Noble Igwe

Nobs is a SLU…shh trust fund kid who works just to exercise his body and mind.
He’s “Unruly” but as calm as the “ABE” boys.
Referred to as FYI (Fly, Young and Igbo) by his friends, Nobs says iT tHe wAy iT iS.

Follow him on Twitter @nobsdaslushhkid

Enough of the English language……..My name is Noble Igwe,go figure!

37 comments

  1. Noble leave ada alone!
    D girl can’t handle ur lifestyle! Its as simple as dat
    Even if u wanted to marry d babe, have u eaten ur 3 square meals? Not to tall of feeding her and her family! Biko let her go

  2. Telling Ada you love her to bits was a bitch move. Girls take this things to heart and it sounds like Ada is naive so she would believe it and it would make it harder fro her to move on.

    Stop leading her on. You need to cut her off once and for all Noble. You’re being mean. Part of you wants her and so you’re not fully letting go. Don’t let her come and visit you. Tell her straight up that you do not want to marry her. Stop being luke warm with the poor babe.

  3. Nobs,I understand the story from your point of view but consider Ada’s feelings.I appreciate ur frank talk with her,since u’re not ready for marriage yet let her be.she might want to argue with you and tell you she can wait,like she has obviously said,but stand your grounds if u know u’rnt ready.
    Secondly,Marriage is not to be rushed into.Marriage is a life contract that shouldn’t be terminated (I.e divorce) due to certain issuses.if u’re not ready,don’t get married.there’s nothing like living life according to ones desiresm

  4. , so I’m d premier commentee.
    Gues u shud rily sit wit Ada to re-affirm ur stance of not ready yet, which by d way contradicts ur parting note o…*rme

    Aww! Nobs is rily into ‘the one’ thingy, its good o, just dat Memoirs will now b ‘the diary of a one-tym-single-Nobs.

    All in all, twas a gud read, kudos for the lettin in on ur lyf.

  5. nobs, in as much as your being considerate of her feeling in not wanting to put your foot down to hard, you should also know that you have told her on countless occassions that your not ready for marriage. you should’nt blame her cos your obviously her first love and its not easy to severe such ties but still i believe that your not ready cos when your ready you’ll be the first to know.
    P.S handle her with care right now cos she might turn around and do something stupid. Hope everything works fine with you. Goodluck.

  6. Lmao..these your stories are like nollywood movie! What the heck? Plus the way you talk about marriage, is it beans? Best not rush into anything.

    Please don’t make the memoirs boring by settling jo, that’s no fun!

  7. socially, you and ada are two parallel lines dat wil neva meet except say na jazz so let her be but its up to u to follow ur church( ice cream factory,orchid bistro,bungalows..etc) mind..lol…..shikena..

  8. Guys and their nonsense. What in the world is “I love you to bits”? Eh Noblechukwu.Be frank, you like that there is this good girl that loves you to pieces but you are not going to marry her. You are not doing her any favours by sparing her feelings. Men think they are being nice by doing that crap, grow some you know what and do the man thing (Sorry guy, I am feeling for Ada today). Babe says I will wait…tell her mba, let her know what your intentions are. If she is yours, she will be there when you are ready but for now you are still into sampling loose girls and you have not found the one that makes you want to settle. Biko, don’t be selfish…stop mincing words and let her move on.
    Tell her you have found someone else, she is not going to harm herself, she’ll be sad but that would be the best thing you can do for her. Don’t have her come down so you can sleep with her, that girl will come and throw herself on you and you are not one to turn it down so biko let her stay where she is. The best thing you can do for her is be truthful with yourself and let her go. Don’t let her mum curse you lol, we want you to live to actually be married.

    1. “…for now you are still into sampling loose girls” LOL! that got me laughing out loud! lmaooo!! ok ok, on a C-rious note though, i never thought i’ld see the day a girl like Ada will be in marriage competition with ‘loose girls’ because of her uber, ultra goodness. Really hilarious stuff. Biko, Abeg, Please leave the babe alone for those that actually deserve her!!

      Uh oh, i feel like i sound like a hater. (reads again) i did! i did! i did sound like a hater!! (im not sha, just saying my mind)

  9. I feel like I was so harsh on you. I just get mad at situations like this. Ada’s mum did not get both sides of the story before coming down on you but she can do that because you are being wishy washy with this matter.

  10. You met Ada when your mom sent you to get something from her parents on the 1st trip to Umuomaku u told us about here. And it was week 5

  11. Nobs, u met Ada durin ur grandma’s burial in Umuchu in Anambra! That was week 5 of the memoirs!
    Expectin ma smva vip ticket o! Gbam. Lol

  12. U met Ada wen u were in attendance of ur grand ma’s burial in Umuchu,Anambra state. She came to deliver sth to ur dad from her dad in a nylon.

  13. Forgt to add dat u met ha in week 5, wen u were in attendance of ur grand mums burial, she came to ur house to deliver sth to ur dad from her dad.

  14. this wan wey everybody dey holla say na week 5 u meet ada, u dey share gift ni?…make me sef follow, she come drop something for ya Pale after ya granma burial for Umoaku….whaever u are sharing, i want…awoof no too dey run bele #Okbye!

  15. Pls leave Ada alone abeg and stop telling her u love her because u don’t and stop acting like a dog in a manger. u don’t want her and u don’t want anybody to have her. tsheeew. I wish I cld talk some sense into her head. u don’t deserve her.

  16. Shwooooooooo! Bobs this noble guy ehn! We resemble small pikin 4hia! Me be PWB o(pure warri boy)! Aphain na lie jor…. U go jst dey feed as with plenty dodo and akuma 4hia like say we sef no be d same life we dey live so! Shwooo! Abegi! U No reach!u get luck say na lagos u dey if to say na waffi u dey me and ma boys for jakpan jusion for don catch u shop sins! Infact I jst read d wan wey u talk say u come warri u ge luck say me no no u by den if nt I for tell all crab men for we area we for kpo kpo u till u start to mess aboniki bam! Go give all dis ur fabu to chico ejiro and RMD them be we brothers for waffi hia them go help u turn all dis ur fabu to acting play!

    My name na okpalefe ogefere! Na #41 okumagba avenue me dey stay opposite dat FCMB bank… Jst ask of efe if u reach dia everybody knw me for dia.

  17. You met Ada, d day after your grandma’s burial in Umuchu, recorded in Week 5 of your memoirs.

    Meanwhile, re Ada, it’s time for some tough love, if you are at a loss for words call Ada’s mum for a script. Apparently she has a way with words.

  18. WOW is all I can say!
    I just discovered your memoirs today and read from WKI till date.Def made for an interewting night shift:)

    Good job, and your blog has really made me wanna move back to Naija.No not become one of your conquests (lol) but just the way you talk about the night life.

    Anywho, keep up d “good” work..

  19. You met ada in week 5, she came to drop some stuff for your folks from her parents during a burial.

    Slim isn’t your type.

  20. u met ada in week 5 at ur grans burial wen she cam to deliver stuffs for ur dad thou u tot they were macthmaking u. now how do i get ma tickets?

  21. tell Ada tht u love her so much … kip her waiting for 5 years and marry slim .. lets see how u will go back to the village…. LMAO

  22. Nobs…
    Her Ma called you…
    You need to leave her alone..
    let her marry Okey..
    Please…
    Just know that you lost a good girl … Well kinda…
    lol..
    The life and times of Noble Igwe.

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