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Welcome to another Monday Memoirs of a Slu…shhKid reading fest, thank you as always for stopping by and to the newbees read the rules before you start judging and appreciating.  Thank you all for your readership, may the memoirs never cease, Amen. 


Dear Diary,

I was pushing hard to clean out my desk before 5.30pm when it all started. My head started aching like someone was getting raped and being pushed about. I thought it was because I was practising 110, so I rushed to the canteen and ordered white rice and pepper soup before mmadu anuo ebe.

The headache was joined by fever and that was when it dawned on me that I was falling ill yet again. I got into my car and called Shirls.

Shirls: Nobs
Nobs: Yo, where are you?
Shirls: Gbagada.What’s wrong with you, you sound different.
Nobs: I’m ill.
Shirls: Serious? Erm where are you?
Nobs: Leaving my office.
Shirls: Wait. I’ll come and get you.
Nobs: No, let’s meet at Yaba.
Shirls: Are you sure you don’t want to wait for me at your office?
Nobs: I’ll be fine, dear.

I managed to drive myself to Yaba and by that time I was really shaking from the fever. Shirls came through 15minutes later.

Shirls: Poor baby. What’s wrong with you?
Nobs: I can’t say but I just need to go home and sleep.
Shirls: We need to get you to a hospital first
Nobs: No, I think I’m just stressed.
Shirls: Okay let’s get to the Island and see how it goes.
Nobs: Please drive like a lady
Shirls: Hehehehehehe, I’ll try but you know you don’t have the strength to beat me sef.
Nobs: I won’t beat you now, I’ll just write it down and wait until I get better.

Shirls jumped a red light but managed to drive like a lady until we got to the Island. We went to the Galleria to get dinner from Barcellos and then went to the pharmacy shop downstairs to get “AdvilPM”.

Shirls took me home, served me dinner, massaged my back and when I slept off, she went home.

Friday 9th July 2010

Dear diary,

I woke up this morning a lil better but not strong enough to go to work but considering the fact that I’ve got loads of deliverables, I just have to go to work. I made Obinna my driver and relaxed all the way to Ikeja.

Slim invited me to her office for their TGIF and I had to pick her sister D from her office.  We got there and trust me, her office peeps sure do know how to ball considering the fact that everybody is a lawyer.


We finished from Slim’s TGIF and headed out to Ikoyi for D’s office “Meet and Greet” dinner before her office nite out at Marquee. We got to the “Meet and Greet” and loads of things were out of place.

1.    It was a standing dinner affair. The host just moved into his apartment and his chairs (according to him) would be  arriving next week.

2.    It was no dinner. People don’t stand at dinners.

3.    Doctors are better dressers than her colleagues’. The ones wearing the right trousers had the wrong shoes while the ones rocking the right shoes had the wrong trousers on.

4.    Someone came with a staff list. Who does that?

We left Ikoyi for Marquee at 12.05am and my boys came through. I was on water diet and promised Slim I wasn’t going to sing at the top of my voice but at some point I found myself shouting to every single song (I got the result later). The party train moved from Marquee to CU also known as Rehab.  Obinna was high so Slim had to drive.  We partied at Rehab and I broke the second promise by drinking. I drank Moet Rose straight from the bottle and Slim caught me.  The real drama started when I walked into Biola on my way back from the gents…

Biola: Mr Igwe
Nobs: Aunty Biola
Biola: So who are you with tonight?
Nobs: My sister?
Biola: Really? By the way I read the insults people showered on me on your memoirs
Nobs: They are just jealous  jor
Biola: Abi oooooo
Nobs: Yes na.
Biola: Hmmmm. So you really had to ask people to help you choose?
Nobs: I was confused and I thought sharing my problems would make it simpler.
Biola: I hope it did.
Nobs: Not really and with these your boobs sticking out I’m even more confused.
Biola: Why do you find it difficult to call or reply BBMs?
Nobs: I’ve been busy. I promise to change
Biola: Let’s go stay Hi to your sis
Nobs: You really don’t have to
Biola: Oh, you have your fat ass Shirls with you?
Nobs: No!
Biola: Oh, then it must be Slim. Let me go introduce myself.
Nobs: I’ve got my Aunty with me and your boobs sticking out like that wont really be a good image for family intro.
Biola: But you always enjoy touching them, now they are not good for family.
Nobs: My aunty is going home tonight so you can sleep at mine.
Biola: Nobs, to you I’m just good for sex and nothing more. I can’t even meet your family?
Nobs: Don’t talk like that na. See I won’t even marry someone that is not good in bed.
Biola: Nobs, I want you to meet my family.
Nobs: Come spend the night, lets discuss more
Biola: I’ll call you on my way, ok?
Nobs: Great.

I walked back to our corner and begged God not to allow the devil bring Biola to our corner. Slim and D dropped me off at home and went to their hotel in Phase 1.

Biola came through about 5.10am and immediately she entered the room, I brought out the boobs and apologized to them with my lips.

Saturday 10th July 2010

Dear Diary,

It was raining hard when I woke up. I pulled Biola closer and we played Papa and Mama.
I was still trying to gain my strength when the phone rang…

Nobs: Hey
Slim: I’ve been knocking
Nobs: (Very alert) Where?
Slims: I’m downstairs with D, brought you breakfast.
Nobs: Sheet!!!
Slim: Is there a problem?
Nobs: Nothing. I’m coming.

For a complete minute I couldn’t think straight and I felt the earth move beneath me. I woke Biola up

Biola: What?
Nobs: My Aunty is downstairs with her husband.
Biola: Will they come in here?
Nobs: They may
Biola: What do we do?
Nobs: Let’s move your things to my sister’s room
Biola: Okay but I really want to meet your family.
Nobs: And you think meeting them after a night of UNHOLY sex is the best way?

We moved her things my sister’s room, I went downstairs to open the door for Slim and D…

Slim: What took you so long?
Nobs: Good Morning should have been a better way to start, don’t you think?
D: Good Morning, Nobs.
Nobs: Good Morning, My love.

We went upstairs and Slim went straight to the kitchen to prepare the breakfast. I prayed like I’ve never prayed before. I asked God to keep Biola in my sister’s room and He did that for me.  We were having breakfast in the living room when I got the BBM “I’m off, Boo. Buzz when your family is gone. I took your shirt with me”

I slept throughout the day while Slim worked on some document beside me.

I woke up feeling feverish and Slim insisted that I have to see a doctor. She drove me to the hospital and even went with me to see the doctor. I was asked to go for a test and after 30munites it was official that I have Malaria. I was given 3 injections in Slim’s presence and afterwards we went to Ice Cream factory. Slim took me home and put me to bed.

Sunday, 11th July 2010

My ever loving diary,

I woke up to find Slim lying down by my side still in her clothes.
Wow! She stayed over just to make sure that I’m okay? Sheet. That got me thinking. She brought me breakfast, stayed with me all day, took me to the hospital and even spent the night on my sick bed. At that point just wanted to hold her and not let go but I was scared I would pass the wrong message and spoil the friendship we’ve got.

Slim woke me up to inform me that she was going home.

Home all day until…7.00pm
I got a text from Shirls, “I’m on my way to yours. What do you want for dinner”.
I replied “You”.

NB: I never knew I was going to write this week but I guess your love, prayers and the fact that some people look forward to this every Monday got me pulling out my Apple Macbook.

Shirls, thank you for getting me home on Thursday
Slim, thank you for everything….BF,Hospital and the BBMs.
D, it was great having you around this weekend.
Deebee, please forgive me.

Thanks to everyone that called to wish me speedy recovery, I’m getting better.

Noble Igwe

Noble Igwe

Nobs is a SLU…shh trust fund kid who works just to exercise his body and mind. He’s “Unruly” but as calm as the “ABE” boys. Referred to as FYI (Fly, Young and Igbo) by his friends, Nobs says iT tHe wAy iT iS. Follow him on Twitter @nobsdaslushhkid Enough of the English language……..My name is Noble Igwe,go figure!


  1. Aren’t u worried dat biola, shirls and slim, would read dis and know what ur trying to hide
    Glad ur feeling better

  2. Slim sounds like a sweet girl….how come she isn’t seeing someone(else)…. Maybe we can hear her story some day.

  3. Slim sounds like a sweet girl….how come she isn’t seeing someone(else)…. Maybe we can hear her story (oops i meant read)some day.

  4. LoL….dude they read this right? I have a feeling this is fictional…if not then u know now that slim knows u where hiding somn and biola knows it wasnt ur fam that came over?? LoL.
    Hope you feel better tho…

  5. i didnt want to respond to your stupid post but now i will. Nobs u are a RAT. a love RAT. a very stupid person. if i had known that it wasnt ur aunt and uncle, i’d have caused a major scene at urs. so wats the point of writing this crap and making me look like a sex pot.
    1stly, u asked me to come to urs and 2ndly u told me that slim and u r just very close friends nothing more (so if thats the case, why couldnt i meet her)
    u also said ada wasnt an issue and that shirls was the one that i could be concerned about cos u and her had had sex before.
    Nobs i hate u and i hope u rot in hell. u can like to fuck urself from now on.
    ive deleted u from my BB just so u knw
    Rubbish. oloriburuku oshi

    PS. This is Biola. I’m sure a lot of u hav formed ur opinion about me cos of this stupid igbo boys rants. i didnt set out to fall for the idiot and at first i thought his posts were amusing but lieing to me this weekend is so uncool and u knw wat fuck all u jobless peeps that read this shit anyways

  6. @Biola,
    You don’t really have to take it this far.
    I didn’t lie to you one bit and like I said. Slim is just a friend. I didn’t want any of you to feel somehow or even meet each other. I thought we understood ourselves.You taking me off your BB isn’t cool at all.We don’t have to discuss this here.You are not a sex pot and I never forced you either.You mean more than that to me and we can settle all these.If you are not cool about me bring our gist here,then fine.I’ll stop but I remember asking you and you said it was cool.I only did what I did so that no one will meet the other.It wasn’t as if we defined what we have.The people reading this played no part and I think we shud really discuss in private.It’s just my memoirs it’s nothing serious and I don’t have your picture anywhere here.Pls take my call.

  7. Nobs…nice piece…I’m stil mad@u anyway..ur gna hav2make it up…BIGTIME
    Glad ur betta nw…
    @bEeyolahhh,I thnk u shd gv up on dis dude..his a very big PANt u dnt nid dis..hehehe

  8. I’m caught between slim nd shirls, they r both sweet hearts nd as for biola it’s late for her…. Get well soon Noble…


  9. Ok is anybody actually meant to believe that comment was really left by “Biola”? Try harder or just crash abeg..

  10. ooooooooooooh! it’s getting ugly up in here.
    Nobs, i have a coupla things to say to you but seeing as someone just gave u a handful to deal with, i’ll let it slide.
    a.k.a. Slim

  11. this is all a scam abeg. fiction and lies. nobs doesnt have this much game abeg and nice making up and posting a fake comment from biola. just low mehn.c’mon

  12. ChickChik and Lekan u guys are about the only sane people here. Nobs is very low. I’m glad there are people who can see through him.
    I am actually surprised that he didnt delete my earlier post. well i guess, he thought leaving the comment was good for his blog
    I’m not even gonna give him any stupid publicity by recommenting but i’m happy i’m not the only one that thinks he has major issues

  13. Lol @ Chichik, if it’s a scam and lies, why do you come back to read it (you’ve obviously been following his rants), this is week 9. What do you know about his game, is it cuz he hasn’t used it on you yet or something?

    Even if it’s fiction it makes for a very entertaining read. It could be an amalgamation of things, a bit of his game, some of his friends and maybe his fantasies. Either way matey we keep coming back for some warped reason. I am waiting for Nobs to evolve, after a while this might become passe, for now I like, so I read.
    Nobs, fire burn all agents of parasitic disease, that what to delay your writing (lol).

  14. omo see vexxx! im sooo loving this!! ladies chill on oluwanoble oo! Hes only entertaining us joor!! Thumbs up noble!! Keep it coming

  15. I’ve looked forward to this article for the past 9 weeks,however,I’m not sure if I will be doing same from now on.
    I see someone trying too hard.
    P.S..getting a fake Biola to leave a comment is wayyyy too low!

  16. abeg biola shut ur cumhole….go and listen to dis song WOMEN LIE MEN LIE….move on wif ur life abeg…i tink i like slim she seems sweet…oga noble na u get motuh pass o…

  17. Lol! Nobs, I hope u feel stupid nw. No one wants to hear about your stupid weekend.
    Abeg keep the insults coming. We need to hurl abuse @ dis piece of work.
    And maybe I should even tell ur blind followers (d ones dt always suck up in blogs) some stuffs about u.
    Let’s see if they’ll still think u r cool and funky

    1. Biola, stop posting comments you are looking like the angry black woman here. You and nobody else chose to have an experience or whatever with Nobs, you also gave him permission to talk about you (when it suited you and you wanted to be perceived as some femme fatale), now that you feel embarrassed and uncomfortable with what is being written here and you feel some people will deem you stupid, you are getting vexed.Let it go and delete this URL from your visiting history, run and never look back.

  18. Crackhead u must be a big fool. I’m sure u r one of those idiots that suck up on pple’s Blogs. Dyu knw me? So y make such a comment. In that deranged mind of urs, u think u said something smart or witty abi? Bloody idiot. Y dnt u put ur real name up. FOOL OSHI

  19. @Biola,
    With all due respect,I may have to block you from commenting here.I’ve left your comments out of respect.
    Let’s take it out of here.
    I still care about you.

  20. This reminds me of Nackson & them Ikebe Super from back in the days. Whether its facts or fiction I don’t care. This could easily be a soap opera or a book. Nobs keep it coming jare!

  21. Yeeeeee… abeg una wan kill person. All this drama… Nobs abeg wetin dey do U sef? No be say I wan know becos if dem get medicine for kain kolo wey dey worry U, I use God beg U no take am! I don laff tire!

  22. bwahahahaha…. nobs, i wonder y u lie nd hide nd feel all smart with urself during d weekend, then come and expose urself up in here… dramaKing much?? …as 4 marriage ish, #teamslim al da way. 🙂

  23. Hilarious stuvs, this is some soap opera….think u shld go wit slim cos she seems to (love)like u alot even tho shes in denial,hehe
    Get well soon nobs!!!

  24. Ok so it is either you are lyin through ur teeth, or u r just too self absorbed to know how ur posts will affect ur relationships! So yeah maybe Biola is just a sex buddy to u but at least give her respect by not lyin to her n treatin her like a whore! For Slim, except she is drinkin some really cheap fermented Shepe, with the kiss (n lie) n tell u r gettin no where with her. So the blog is your memoirs and is meant for entertaining, don’t use dt as an excuse to show ur vanity or excessive care for just u! Or maybe u shld, so pple will know d type of person u r up front. As for Biola, if u r real, stop commenting leave it be, its a lesson well learnt, stay away from guys like him and have more respect for urself.

  25. This is just some fake shit…really! u guys must be so shallow minded to believe dis is actually real. noble isnt even so hot like dat sef to have girls running after him n all,hes probably just putting these up to make yall think hes got game…yeah right! with dat big head n really short,uv got to be kiddin. its so friggin obvious dat biola doesnt exist. u re just a shameless prick Noble,u should try harder. na wa…SMH…dry stupid stuff. for Christs sakes,what do u even do sef dat makes u think uv got game?…dude,u suck ass! Slushkid my ass! get a life loser!!

  26. @ iCRITIC don’t hate appreciate! Haba?? Na jeje oluwanoble write blog oo!! In my opinion ur more of a shameless prick coming to read this! If u find this blog so annoying or unblivabl then stop reading! GBAM abi na by force!! Please ooo! Don’t piss those of us that find this entertaining off! I bliv erryone involved is an adult so they r responsible for themselves! Like diddy says Hate is for SUCKERS! Get a life and don’t be a sucker!!
    Noble, carry go joor! We got ur back!

  27. Pulled out my Apple Mac? who da hell says Apple Mac? Twe!!

    “Moet Rose straight from the bottle” Was all that name dropping necessary?

    AdvilPM huh? More like alabukun

    I beg go sidoun jere…you are becoming too Phony for your own good!

    And randomly phuking all these women…If there is any truth to this BS….have you been tested? AIDS is real son!

    Most of you Nig boys walk around with it anyway…solly fo you!

  28. LMAO….

    My mind was telling me Slim was funke, bt wasnt 2 sure Btw my guy likes u ooo (kactus)..Lmao..

    Nyways, i dont blive jack…

    Nice 1 nobs

  29. Drama, drama… Fact or fiction, totally entertaining. and ummm…. Missanni/slim/funkolaani, according to ur blog you like Noble… why the statement, ‘i would be if he was my man or if i wished he was’…girl come on. 🙂

  30. Bwahahaha Fulva!!!!
    Omo!!! To be honest, I actually
    look fwd to reading
    this shiznit evry monday..Its like a moth to a flame!
    But I just don’t believe
    most of this shit shaa.. *shrugs*
    Nehoo #teamslim ..
    Aldoe now,I really doubt there
    Wud even be a “slim” anymore!

  31. I want laff die with all the comments. Nobs memoirs are simply entertaining and i enjoy reading them, but for anyone to think that the shit is real…..really has to get his/her head examined.

  32. so i finally talks to Nobs and he says he didnt actually mean to portray me in a negative light. I’m sorry for being rude to anyone here and Nobs i’m sorry for abusing u. its all good as long as u dont blog about me again. I know i agreed to u blogging about us and all but remember what i told u on saturday.

    Anyways its all good, i’ll see u after work.

    Lol @ me starting my own blog. it’ll be very boring. nothing fantastic happens to me

  33. Nobs, u just had to over-do it and spoil it for everyone, didn’t u? Dunno the type of girls u meet that even let u write stuff like this about them! Be careful, son or u won’t have anyone to write about soon!

  34. Nobs! Nobs!! Nobs!!!

    You making the straffing look so easy!!!

    Now with the fake Slim & fbee putting comments, that was …

    Need to “Calm down” small, some of us do have grey hair!!!

    Peace out

  35. I LOVE APPLEMAC’s comments!!!!

    pls hola @ me, u R D REALEST!!!

    i was thimking the exact same thing bruv, who the fuck says “Apple Mac”,


  36. Omo fact or fiction the fact that u guys come to read dis every monday means its a good read, am so sure most of u chatting BS on here n cursing wld be d first to log on next monday so abeg free the guy…

    Abeg Nobs keep d memoirs coming some peeps do enjoy reading, i knw i do

    LMAO @ Slim n Biola (FAKE OR REAL)

  37. This is too funny. Noble Igwe na u biko.
    I saw you at Marquee on friday with your friends and that CNN Purefoy guy.
    First what do u do for a living and how much dyu earn? i think you live a reckless life and you have to be careful.
    No doubt u were popping champagne and kissing (or is it pecking) most of the girls there but I was wondering what these girls see in you
    You are ugly, a midget and you have a very big head. Maybe you are well endowed in your below region… (which i doubt)I think its that your head that u stick inside them. i dont blame u, if minime can get babes, why cant you.
    If your money was legit, you wont be popping that many bottles of moet rose. Maybe you even popped it on credit. I am not beefing you, i am only advising you because you are so loud and annoying.
    i want to advice you, go and join nollywood and contest with aki and pawpaw or join the circus you will make a very good freak show

  38. Nobs Nobs Nobs…
    Reading your blogs is quite a thang to look forward too..biolah + ada + guy u r balling O..( If all u gist us is true) pepper and salt is good for some gists to have flavour sha!
    On the Air Mac sturves *people should appreciate the litrary completeness and what it does for ur mental completeness of a story* @least naow u can picture his environment..
    The whole replies on the blogg too is a plus..
    Nobs abeg keep up the good work..Nack more for Intrest Nna!

  39. How come evryone keeps askin Nobs what he does for a living?…Nobs I suggest u just tell us whatever…come out with it already!! A little birdie just said u suck up to em celebrities to be a celebrity by force…follow follow actually! True? Don’t wanna believe it tho! WHAT DA HECK DOES NOBLE DO??

  40. @Nobs – U need to set the record str8. Although I know u r legit in all ways (I see when u come 2 our office), tell d pips a little about ur professional life.

    Because the yabs/ insults are becoming too personal, unless if u like d negativity.

    Peace bro.

  41. Noble, u have been busted. U’ve been disgraced. D comments r wow. I forsee d death of if u keep putting up shit and thinking of urself or ur blog as more dan interesting.stop living a fake life and get real. Broke ass!

  42. Lmao!!!U haters r really amazing. Why d fuck shld he gv a rats ass abt wat u think abt him and wat u thnk he does for a living.
    Its a fuckn blogg,y r u takn it so serious!!!
    If u not interested in d shit he bloggs abt then get a fuckn book or google some shit up or fuckit don’t read atall.
    D comments r just gettn more outrageous.
    True or untrue who gvs a fuck???did any of u haters read his rules to read by. Nigerians r so fuckn fake smtimes mehn jeez actn all holy and shit.

  43. OMG,the comments are getting ridiculous. All the negativity from where to where. And what’s the big deal about the poor boy popping Moet Rose and he decides to share it here.If it’s not your reality does not mean it is impossible. If he wants to follow celebrities and he’s having a good time, it’s his choice and it’s his life, wetin concern you.
    Abeg Nobs do you. Don’t tell people what you do for a living, noisy buggers will never be satisfied and the silence will piss some people off, lol.

    If you have beef with Nobs, abeg take it off the boy’s blog.People chatting so much ish, before you post a comment , read over it. I know cyberspace is massive and all, but stop posting your negative crap here.

    Whether it is real or fake, it got a reaction out of you. THINK BEFORE YOU POST

    1. @Whether it is real or fake, it got a reaction out of you.

      My sentiments exactly!!

      There is no such thing as bad publicity….make believe or true story, he has our undivided attention!

      Brilliant Nobs! Free publicity! As a matter of fact, I can bet my last dollar the biggest critic will be back same time next week!

  44. Nobs gives a ‘mean head’? This person came here to sell Noble’s “album”. Then again, I’m not sure if the comment was an insult or a compliment.

  45. Boring Stuff!

    Which peeps read all these every day Nobs put his shit crap up.
    I would if only he was brave enough to say its higly fictional.
    @Nobs: Re u faking a multiple personality? Its shallow.

    Out of my readzone!
    I can read crap, but urs is way too unreadable

  46. Leave Mr Noble alone. Y r there so many negative people in naija.
    So wat if he sucks up to celebrities. At least they know who he is.
    Its a free world. Allow the guy
    Noble do u jor.

  47. Am not a fan of noble igwe. But this is not about him. It’s a blog. U either read or you don’t. Anybody can pop whatever on credit or pay cash. I don’t see the big deal in him popping anything. Like I said it’s his blog. U have a choice NOT to read. No use giving him the cheap publicity he has always wanted. That’s my 2 cents

  48. @ Wanderer its fake but we like it ode!!
    @ isupporticritic 360nobs won’t die @ least hidiots keep coming back 2 comment! I trust ull be the first to come bk next week oo!
    @ lilly you are just a beever! I bet u wish u were in nobs shoes! Go tell ur advice to my dogs!
    @ zara big boys use apple macs and haters like u keep wondering.
    @ HA Badman no be by force 2 read oo!
    @fluva next time just scratch ur arse and sniff ur fingers jejerly! Please don’t come back next week oo!!
    @Apple mac nobs just blivs if uve got it, flaunt it (or describe it in this case) stop hating it makes u age!
    @ anthony don’t mind them! Its obvious ppl are just haters and cannot appreciate the details nobs gives to his writings! To get APPLE MAC an POP ROSE no be small matter oo! A brother gats floss!!
    @Nobs I think you should send the rules to all these jealous beevers! They seem to have forgotten fast!! *Hi 5* jare! A job well done!! We dey enjoy ur blogs!! KARRY GO!

  49. All these people don’t even know you but they just feel the need to come on here and judge you. Shame!(((((Hugs)))))
    People, judge not that ye be not judged.

  50. Nobs is a good person. I don’t know why people are so nasty.
    Its his blog and he has a right to blog about anything he feels like.
    Why are you attacking his person? Has he hurt any of u in anyway
    Anyways Nobs, I enjoy your memoirs so keep em coming

  51. Gosh…y all dis hate..@applemAc I Think your fuckin dumb u can’t live d life so y hate on dose who can? no 1 needs to see u drop any shitty comments here..and all d oda idiots hu think its a sham go screw urselves we enjoy readin dis n we gna b bak here on monday…bring it on NOBS

  52. @the observer u r a big fool…see how dumb ur accessment was. I blame u! I know 360 nobs wud die soon.noble is pleading on twitter for writers to rescucitate his blog.* Evil laff*

  53. wow! we have officially located d most jobless person here – THE OBSERVER!!!

    wtf do u mean by big boys use apple macs? u clearly live in a world totally different from mines! dats like saying big boys use blackberrys !!! stop being a cock sucker and go get a job so that u can get urself an “apple mac”! retard!


      I swear no BULL…I peed my pants!!

      Really though Apple Mac? I love the analogy!

      I honestly dont have beef with NOBS, just let folks know your blog is a combination of fact and fiction…Opari

      He was on to something for sure but when reality became a blur thats when the drama started.

      Im not sure what make me a hater to Observer….hmmm perhaps because I’ve not had NOBS “mean head”

    2. @Zara and Apple Mac,

      For sometime,I wanted to let your comment slide but after reading the Rules to read by once again i decided to come back to do this.
      Now get out pen and paper for some schooling.
      course 1. The Apple
      If you’ve ever bought an Apple product,you will understand that the instruction does not include what to call it or how.
      So if i decide to Call it Apple mac or Apple Macbook or Apple Macbookpro.
      it’s all totally correct cos i can also write with Apple iphone,imac and ipad but i had to include Apple so that people like you don’t think I’m taking about a make up brand.
      Same way i can say Honda Civic,Honda Accord,Toyota Camery
      Course 2.The Moet.
      I know in your mind just because people say “Rose” you automatically thick it’s a brand produced only by Moet.
      Please moving forward,note that most wine manufactures produce the Rose blend and what is your problem if i decide to specify mine?
      Just so you know,there are;
      Moet Necter Rose,Moet & Chandon Champagne Imperial Rose,Moet & Chandon Brut imperial Rose,Armand de Brignac NV Brut Rose Ace of Spade,Nicolas Feuillatte Rose to mention a few.
      As stated in the Rules,you are not forced to read or leave a comment here.
      Write the above down and Thank me later

  54. Loool…kai the internet is the best place to find stupid pple sha. But its very amusing! please keep it up!!

    btw @ The Observer the beef with the ‘apple mac’ is with the tautology. Iv never seen a microsoft mac before. As for the moet rose, i wouldnt know, i dont drink (much)

    keep the (silly) comments coming!

  55. All ye followers of noble, I dnt blame u guys. Wat do u expect from birds of a feather…noble himself is not happy wit d negative comments. I bet u’ld soon be disgraced openly…quote me. People like u always get it hot from karma. Debasing womanhood is no joke talk more of doing it on d internet. Ur reward is wit karma. *watch out!*

  56. Wow I leave you all for one day & you are fighting like cats & dogs??? Shame on you all. Naija does not understand freedom of speech sha. Too much Jealousy Jealousy. O gini?!?!

  57. Hear urself talk! U sound more like a retard dan nobs…we d readers av freedom of speech too and y are u attacking it? Talk abt jealousy? Who shud jealous whom? R people jealous of a fake dumb guy dat basks in material things he hasn’t or hopes to av?, a dying blog? A multiple personality person? A guy dat feeds on slim’s mercy? Wat shud we be jealous of? It’s obvious u drink omo while ur mates r popping sme imaginary moet rose! Plz reset!

  58. @All,
    Thank you for your comments.
    I’ll share the details of my meeting with Biola on Monday.
    The love here is amazing.

  59. its so sad to see people attack his character solely based on what they read here….actually its appalling and pathetic really!!!! going after his character yada yada ….its a memoir aka diary aka life from his point of view made public. Believe it or not you’re not required to read it ….i know shocking!!!!!

    For the people who have issues with what he writes and you have to read something can go to “” it has a really cool blog there’s a lot of truth telling going on and no label dropping i guarantee you will not be offended/ outraged…..oh and a bonus it has video blogs too ..very exciting. IOW get a life and get off the poor boy’s balls

    PS: i don’t know noble he doesn’t know me i’m a reader just like you 🙂

    *que in eldee’s big boy ft olu maintain et al….(na papa God give me i say thank you….. lau lau spending pounds ati dollars….why you dey vex is it your money)

  60. why are people so ugly and venomous? how do u know he is living a fake lifestyle and if he does why are you all so angry about it? wats with the negativity? u abuse his blog but u come back to read and post more negative comments.
    you talk about karma. yes it is real and it’ll bite u all.
    to those that are praying for the death of and are happily running their mouth assassinating his character, note that you all will need support oneday either for business, project or whatever and i pray that your helpers will not be sleeping or listening to the negative stuffs about u all.

    Nobs i dont know you personally but i follow u on twitter and i think u are a very cool person.

    so wat if he is soliciting for writers on his blog? is that a bad thing? if u had a business u r running, i’m sure u’ll do whatever u have to to make it run.

    Carry go my brother. keep on popping moet rose and using ur apple mac. u have a right to the kind of life u dream of.

    I’m not gonna call anyone a hater here but i’ll ask you all to check urselves and be careful of ur utterances and how it can affect a person. May we not be punished in the future for things we are doing now (we migh think its harmless but note that our words can affect other people’s lives)

    Noble u also need to be more sensitive on ur blog. If Biola is indeed real, u hurt her. i hope u make up with her.

    May God bless us all and bless the works of our hands. May we also find favour and may God put our enemies to shame (i.e if in God’s opinion they deserve to)

    my, that was a very long sermon. feel free to comment and criticise with love

  61. Asshole…dat was such a cheap coment..its a blog n I cld name my self woteva I lyk,I’m nt writin a bloody resume so I dnt hav 2spell nothin right…I hope u dnt gt choked up on ur own beef cos d way thngs r goin it luks lyk ur gonna real soon…so stop hatin luk4hw 2 make sme money2pop water or wateva it is u thnk ur lil pocket can…and stay d fuck off here…p.s u kip cmin bak2read d blog…I thot it was BS…total asshole

  62. @ “strictly for @h2n and nobs” bwahahahahahahahahahahahahaha! U be Mugu oh. Freedom of speech for u on another persons blog. Shey @ the top it clearly states: “read the rules…before you start judging and appreciating” OLE! No be by force. If the thing pain u reach go & start your own blog. & knowing follow follow like u I’m betting dollars, pounds & euros that your blog will be a knock off boring piece of shit. Go fuck yourself in the meantime. & feel free to jump off a cliff when you are done.
    PS: Nobs I enjoy this blog & your Houston readers say keep on keeping on. Looking 4ward 2 next weeks post

  63. Your London readers love ♥♥ ♥ ♥♥ ♥ ♥♥ you. I will here next Monday, don’t disappoint,lol.

  64. To all the people saying u don’t know nobs. Most of the ppl dropping the negative comments actually know him ‘his person’ and not just thru the blog or twitter. Right from his days of virgin atlantic and him begging for shirts and money and ish. So the ppl “judging” and “hating” are actually doing so cos they know him.
    PS: I typed this from RIM Blackberry bold 3

    1. Nobs worked at Virgin Atlantic? Were u the one that gave him his employment letter there? All of u insulting his person on here, as I’ve just gathered, u might know him, i dare u to walk up to him and say a quarter of what you’ve spewed on here. Just one quarter! Internet hooligans. And Sir/Madam MOI, according to u, he was begging before, now he can afford it, praise the Lord. Why r u angry?

  65. nobs, only God knows y its paining u o! i did not knock ur hustle or try give u advise on ur love triangle or quadrangle or woteva u av going on cos to me its hilarious and i personally think u av balls for putting it all out in the open yea

    ur speaking as though u only expected positive comments for such a controversial blog, i think not.

    all that one up der is story, u could have easily said a ‘MAC’ and got away wit it, its not as if people go around saying RIM blackberry or volkswagen bugatti!

    i personally think u hav bigger problems…jst tellin u so u dont sound razz in public


  66. smh. this is a very clear case of people crying more than d bereaved; or people swallowing panadol 4 another person’s headache. u guys are turning this guy’s diary into sum’n very phenomenal, when its obviously not! abeg, u guys shld stop showing urselves on d world wide web. Haba! Much Ado About Nothing. *hiss*

  67. @MOI

    so what if he used to beg for shirt and money?????? its his life isnt it. so because u knw someone u must judge and hate him. that is so sad.

    1. i am a psychologist n frm sme commnts u v left its obvious u suffering frm low self esteem…………i v sme drugs i cn prescible to you doe ….

  68. aw man… talk about ridiculous.

    Dear Nobs, I dunno you from anywhere at all… don’t follow you on twitter or anything. I just accidentally stumbled upon this website and I was hooked (you’ve done such a nice job here, you and your writers definitely know how to keep people entertained!)

    I can not be bothered if your escapades are true or not. Point is, you deliver exactly what you promised. You seem like a very cool person, perhaps a tad reckless but it is not my place to judge…

    Your blog is the personification of the rather cliche saying that “behind every successful person lies a pack of haters”. I guess all these people “hating” (i really detest the word) on you are only jealous of your seemingly exciting lifestyle.

    To all those taking advantage of the anonymity of the internet to attack the ‘slush kid”s person: grow a pair! stop being such cowards- if you have a problem with him, tell it to his face.

    That is all.

  69. Wonder why yall re fightin for Nobs,he deserves every bit of the ‘tongue-lashin’ he’s facing right now. I seriously don’t feel sorry for him one bit. Yall shoulda seen d way he totally rediculed Ruggedman,callin him even worse names…and yeah,the awful piece he wrote about him too. Half of wat has been said here isn’t half as much as the crap he said to Ruggedman. So he seriously deserves it. He sucks ass…yall should say it as it is abeg. Whoever says ‘Apple Mac’?…even my young niece calls it a friggin Mac. He’s no doubt fake ass n trying too hard to belong. Be real men…we off all that shit!

    1. Get ur facts right. Noble didn’t write the Ruggedman piece. One of his writers did. Her name is written boldly at the bottom of the post. Stop commenting on issues and people u know nothing about and besides this is a blogpost, not everything written here is in good taste but leave the young man alone. Is he owing you? Address ur grievances to his face and stop whining

  70. Talk bout controversial…dis blog is bringin d heat…I’m luvn..hw cme all d oda wks didn’t..pple just woke up al of a sudden??
    Nobs u knw I luv u we enjoy readin dis so pls keep it comin….mwaaaah

  71. To everyone: you’ve all proved a point, which is, that u reckon with Nobs.
    To those who think it’s in their place to disgrace, expose or preach to him: may God save u from ur self-righteousness.

    1. lmao, more like am typing from my HP Pavilion Entertainment notebook..hahahahhahahha
      Haterz, jump into the lagoon….

  72. don’t know why nobs bothers himself to reply some haters we all love this blog that’s why we keep coming back to read, wish I ave the guts to write a diary, keep it up bro, even d biola that started this drama is back with nobs. kind of like all this drama it makes the blog interesting.

  73. Dis is really funny, see beef oh nobs I luk forward to ur blog every monday nd I no des tins r real.4 d haters pls start ur own blog we luv u nobssssss.

  74. @ BIOLA.. sweetie … Nobz isnt tht into U !! get over ursef !! if a guy likes u dat much U wouldnt have to remind Him to call U n always be wit U .. it is clear tht ur MR fantastic in bed (nobz) just wants u in bed …. n no one is jealous of ur sex relationship wit nobz .. ppl re free to comment n say woteva they like .. read d rules babes !! i really like ur relationship wit slim .. pls dont spoil it .. if its meant to be it will , Ada isnt ur type , u might not be able to do ur public appearances wit her. I strongly believe dat a woman doesnt belong in the kitchen .U can get a cook to make food .. a steward to serve it n give u washing hand water basin on his head while kneeling down…. u need to be wit someone u can have an actual discussion with , life n marriage is not abt Firewood, ukwa n fetchn water in d stream !

  75. @ nobs, dont get it , these girls read abt themselves and u bother to hide one from the other, why bother , just run a playboy ring, Heph wouldn’t mind ! Bro u need to take it easy tho, malaria has a way of slowing ur game down , and u need to be in top shape for d sweeties in nobs”ville”


  76. This totally made my morning!! from now on I’m hooked on dis ish!! For the haters! Stop acting on personal beef!! Its very sad!! Its his blog he can write wateva he wants, if u don’t like it logoff!! If u feel compelled to comment, attacked the story not his person!!

  77. @ zara and moi and all the haters,i dont have a problem with ur comments as u have a ryt to express ur self but i wonder why d attack on his personality and not the blog, why abuse or attack someone u dont know?

    @ nobs, pls ignore all d haters, they re just looking for cheap attention.

  78. I know I’m as late as christs second coming, but can I just say, guys, please use a spellcheck app or something when commenting. Some peoples english on here ranges from hilarious to Appalling… “Attacked the story” made me lol though…. 🙂

  79. I need to come up with new and interesting stories regularly so people will notice me & not forget about my blog. Though most of the stories are made up & pure fiction, there are people who totally believe them which is the important thing cos the aim of this blog is popularity and money….lol.

    I never learnt to respect women so I dont want anyone telling me to respect them cos they are all the same & I can sleep with any one of them; slim, shirls, ada, biola, ivory….anyone i want, anytime……girls, always willing……

    more free women…..more…..more (pls the younger the better, no old keles abeg….16yrs-25yrs only….sweet…)
    you can call me pervert, anything you want….I dont care….

  80. hmm…i like slim, i think she’s real…biola..haba!!! he that good girl…let go!! @ nobs better do another test after the malaria drugs cos i dont trust biola!!!LOL!!

  81. jeeeeeze! #PAUSE Is this real life or Fiction? i’m #Lost …Hope i’d get notifications when more replys r posted sha

  82. why the fuck are some ppl,getting their nickers in a twist!!! its only a blog…. no need for ppl to let him what to do and how to write his blog, if u don’t like it don’t read it!

  83. SLim seems a goodie to me. She’d prolly make a gd companion in a real case scenario.
    However, i think u ve this thing of saying what u were wearing , drinking and then the mention of ur apple mac book. Mehn, i think all dat are TMI.

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