Next Generation: Are We Ready For Us?

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Our generation is well know for whining about the damage that the generation of our fathers has brought on our world, and our nation in particular, from a near rotten political class to a society with almost non existent infrastructure. We rise everyday and swear by our Nikes and Jimmy Choos that if we can get our hands on the steering wheels of governance we will definitely turn things around. I believe in this too, I am actually a strong advocate of handing over to youth. Then I paused. I took some time to do a comparison between the lives our parents have lived and the lives we live now. I compared certain institutions we were born to be aware of, and took a look at how they (our parents) run them. In the end, I shook my head, reality hit me in the gonads – our own generation would be the worst. Let us look out, at how we handle relationships/marriage as a case study.

Writing this piece, I have not assumed infinite wisdom, neither have I overlooked the possibility of exceptions. I have never been married, but I have been around long enough to see more than enough.

Our generation has totally re-written the rules of human relationships, we have totally re-written the rules of human sexuality, the definition of shame, of sacrifice, and of unity in a relationship or marriage, these have been re-worked. Guys do not see it as an issue anymore to wear the toga of perpetual “bachelorism” with pride, some even brag about how they are going to die as Hugh Hefner.  Girls lower than 20 have already cultivated the unenviable status of playettes, they are playing 5 guys on the go, and all they get is applause from their kind.  To them they are winning territory they perceive originally belonged to the menfolk.  I ask, were our mothers, lesbians?  Even if they were, it wasn’t bandied about with so much brazenness.  These days we are all gradually succumbing to the ethos that every girl has a bit of lesbianism in her. What has the world turned into on our watch?

I can remember parents of yon enduring hard times to keep the family as a unit, for the sake of the kids, I can remember mums and dads enduring “shit” from each other, knowing fully well that whatever was causing their rancour would pass, that it was nothing compared to the cohesion of their family.  That is alien now, girlfriends are not willing to work things out, boyfriends won’t even take shit for a second – and these are the folks who will get married to somebody in future, start a family, and as soon as “shit hits the fan” they are gone, gone with the wind into the land of whiners, man/woman-bashers, cougars, and irresponsible fellows.  As the wise ones once said “build a family, build a nation”.  With the current spate of brief marriages, separations, and the like, how on earth do we hope to build this nation?  It is doomsday, this is the apocalypse, the one of which the prophesy was made.

I don’t know if there is a way back, in a world of “independent women”, of women who value jewellry above relationships, in a world of men who have now decided to stop giving a damn. What hopes have we got? The easy way out would be to join them if you can’t beat them, that in essence will be the final nail in the proverbial coffin.  Church seems to have failed, the imams seem to be interested in other pursuits outside clergy. I laughed when it dawned on me that the worst girls are actually ushers or choristers or belong to some groups in church, or are the ones whose hijabs were meant to keep all of the light out – I cringe when it turns out that the men who should be the ones taking the lead in trying to keep things together have lost faith in themselves, have decided to toe the easiest way out – play the game of “I just don’t give a fuck.  It is about to go down, we are about to lose it as a collective. I can already feel the warmth of the tears of our parents, this wasn’t how they intended we turned out, but turn out that way we will. I assure them.

So do you still think we are ready as a generation to take over the mantle of how our world is run? Anyone? *crickets*?

The Monk Speaks

The Monk Speaks

Blunt as a bludgeon, with wit the sharpness of a mesuya's knife, this Ibadan born native of the Delta comes at you with critical, incisive, and graphic dissection of random issues from Politics, Entertainment, Lifestyle, and Relationship - spiced with the correct measure of lightheartedness. Geek and Monk met on paper, welcome to this my world.

15 comments

  1. Nice read, Interesting perspective,….Yes, the traditional roles and attitudes of men and women have changed and some might say their roles have even been swapped. Regardless, I think the new attitude of our generation may serve us well…it’s all about adapting…our parents may weep because we have fallen far from the apple tree, but they will have no regrets, because our new ideals and attitudes will be commensurate to the evolving world we currently live in! most of these new attitudes were stolen from the western world, and it seems to work for the Western society. So why wouldn’t it work for us? So, Yes, we are ready as a generation to take over the mantle of how our world is run.. infact, WE RUN THIS…..

  2. Totally agree with Ebony Diva…and like you said there are exception to the rules…not every girl or man is like that, and truth is i think our generation will not stand to put people in place, that lack the values you speak of, we have had enough…so yes we are ready to take over the mantle, cos underneath all the rubbish lurks the greatness that will change Nigeria…

  3. Maestrodamuz,nice piece. Touched d right places in the bone,cos u are spot on. But when all is said and done,i think we the youths are ready to take over. If not for anything, our elders have bn dere and failed us,so lets try the YOUTHS nowwwwwwwwwwwww!!!!!!!!!!!!

  4. First and foremost, what you have to realise is that the whole world has degenerated not just the Nigerian society. We now live in a world that Priests abuse young boys and girls, Priests declaring they are gay and even gay people marrying in Church. Its the world over and perhaps it’s a sign of the end-times.
    Whatever we are now and whatever caused it, I still believe that our generation is ready to take over the mantle. I honestly believe that our generation is fed up with the way our parents and fore-fathers have handled things. Fine, we might be naughtier, more westernized and all but I believe we still have the desire for things to ‘work’. I believe we will demand more accountability of ourselves as more people’s eyes are now open and our generation pick up more western traits of professionalism, democracy and all that.
    I believe every generation will always have that ‘golden bunch’ of people who want things done right, who still care about the state of their society and want to have not just an impact but a positive one. Who in the world thought Lagos would have such a proactive governor as Guvnor Fash? I, and most people hadn’t even heard of him before he became Governor. He seemed to have appeared from nowhere! We can all see the impact he is making and even the man on the streets would gladly shout for Fashola to continue ruling on and on and on.
    So, there is nothing to fear. The world has gone through very turbulent periods. Wars, famine, diseases and all but at the end, timeless principles of truth and justice will always prevail. What Nigeria needs is more true and committed ‘leaders’. I don’t mean just mean political leaders but you and I. Doing things right and doing the right things is all it takes.
    Naija 4ever!!! Although sometimes I feel like losing all hope for this country, something just kicks in and I know deep in my gut that Nigeria will be great. God bless Nigeria.

  5. @ EbonyDiva:seriously, do you think it’s working out for the western world? May i remind you that the western world ideology we seem to be adapting has the highest rate of divorce. It is also in the western world where a child will wake up one morning, go to school and open fire on this classmates or torch up his classmate for being a loser.
    If this is the standard we have chosen to adapt then we are clearly headed for doom.

  6. Nigerians are the most hypocritical people i know. we’re not ready, we haven’t been and until we realize that blood will have to be shed, we will not be ready. someone once said the only work your parents are required to do for you is ‘give birth to you’ we keep blaming our parents, how many of us will bravely stand against 10 million naira, cos you know they gonna shut u up with money. The change for this country starts with the common man and the common man’s mental thots haven’t gotten past 3 square meals in a day. Marriage??? lets not go there!!!

  7. All I've got to say is how does my sexual orientation determine how well I lead? I believe you should remove religion and sexual orientation out of this. I think it is FAR more important for a people to have a leader who has integrity, vision and practices justice in all of her/his affairs. Therefore, if a person has a sexual orientation which is not the norm or is practicing a religion should be secondary to what everyone needs in a leader-A fair, brilliant and visionary individual.

  8. my question is, do 25 year olds build empires in the days of our fathers? nope. so much have gone bad with the youths of these days wrt spiritualism, relationship, sexual orientation BUT at the same time, so much have also changed in the way the youths see life, in their ambitions, their pursuit for excellence and greatness. and i say, the mantle shld be handed over now

  9. @Okikade it goes a very long way to determine how you’d lead… West Africa is a high power distance society and our country Nigeria has an above average masculinity culture…where the roles of men and women are clearly defined. A family unit (where “charity” begins can’t be made up of 2men…or 2women as parents)…and yes, this starts with rships….it is not OUR style.
    Personally, I don’t think we are ready as we cannot lose our values and norms redirecting our energy towards imitating other people and take our nation to greater heights…Nope.
    @Rinz at 25, our fathers n mothers hadn’t built empires but they had stable families…that alone shows a degree of responsibility…they weren’t blessed with as much resources as we’ve got now and yet.

    On the other hand though, exposure comes with its perks…its difficult to absorb the ‘positives’ without some negative aspects….also, our economy is so unfavorable to the average youth so the amount of energy and vigor you’d put in just to keep your head up without compromising your values now is appalling.

    There’s still hope I believe…the fact that we are aware of our issues.

  10. I have often said this to my friends and have something like this in my scrap book. i totally agree with The Monk. Someone said Leave out sex and religious orientation?? what then is left of a decent man if we can leave out some parts and work with some parts. integrity, honesty, leadership, etc are all qualities that can be gleamed from deeds and sexuality, spirituality are part of what makes a whole man. The monk has said it all. Lesbianism, Divorce, corruption has always been just a few of man’s weak points right from generations past but never has it been publicly and so brazenly accepted as our generation and this shows that we are weak-willed at best. Immature, selfishness, impudence,total disregard for authority, etc are just a few of the ills plaguing our generation. yes our current leaders are making a mess of serving the people and haven’t done much to earn our respect but we are the ones making d most mess; making a mess of ourselves. destroying our soul by giving in to the flesh and its instant gratification. we don’t fight our inner demons anymore, rather, we give in to it and that’s the new cool. However, i do believe we still have truly decent youths. the ones who don’t worship money, false acclaim and still appreciate and value the importance of humility, family, and deferring to parents and elders… They are the ones who will rise from the ashes of materialism, social decadence and moral turpitude and take this country forward, all the way to the promised land.

    i may have rambled and made a few grammatical errors but pointing it out to me before addressing the issue at hand would only further drive home my point…:D XX

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